The Stanley Parable is game about a man named Stanley who lives his life pressing buttons on a computer. However, when all his co-workers are gone, he has to explore the office building to find out what's going on and why this is happening. Even though the game itself has no true ending, it's still entertaining in every way shape and form. The narrative dialog is very intriguing and at sometimes funny. Although sometimes in narrative dialog, I find myself ranting about things he says.

Quick Examples

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ 1. "Didn't I impress apon you how important it was to be like Stanley?"
Stanley's job is pushing buttons on a screen all day and taking orders from almost everyone. Pretty sure there's a reason why the player doesn't wanna be Stanley, even though he IS the main character.

2. "OK, fine, you're not gonna do it? But you know what? It's pretty humiliating to bring you this far only for you to suddenly decide you have better things to do!"
This thing has no voice modification system. It's obvious why I didn't do it.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Besides some negative dialog, the game is the most insane piece of gaming I've come across so far. This game has many endings, which made me wonder what kind of life Stanley has been living.

Theory
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Stanley was created by narrator for his own purposes. Those purposes are unknown. Could be to torture a soul for no reason, or because he was bored. Either way, the truth is, this whole time there was no boss, no co-worker, no wife, no kids, no nothing. Stanley lives in a universe created by the narrator and lives in endless limbo.

Well, who were they? There are three answers to this question.

1. The Wikipedia answer: a four member jazz-punk fusion band formed in 2003 in Osaka, Japan featuring Mariko on vocals, Yoshitaka on drums, Keigo Iwami on bass, and Hajime on keyboard. Their disbandment was publicly announced by vocalist Mariko Gotō on December 25, 2010, with their last show titled "Sayonara, Gotō-san" being played on December 28.

2. My friends' answer: pretty cool, but the singer sucks

3. My answer: nothing less than the best band of the 00s.



I will probably stand by that statement forever, since I went absolutely crazy over them from December '14 to January '15. If I was going to list my favourite songs ever, Midori would have a good 20 songs gracing the top of that list. I'm hooked! And the fact they broke up without the Western world knowing anything about them makes me very very disappointed indeed. Like, shame on you. All of you motherfuckers whining about rock music being dead just let an incredible rock band pass by under your nose!

To be fair, though, despite some popularity in Japan they were complete unknowns to the Western world. So it's unreasonable to get mad about them being underrated, especially since none of their 3 albums are available in the West. I'm gonna go ahead and make this blog post a loose history of the band, so if anyone is interested you can discover them for yourself. I promise they're it's a worthwhile listen.

note: any lyrics mentioned are my own translations, and thus probably incorrect. the track titles are probably more accurate, since a more reliable source provided them.

ファースト (First)



This EP was their introduction to the Japanese music scene: a bizarre swing-metal hybrid, a song about witnessing a couple partaking in anal, a pop song and some throwaways. Not the ideal first impression, but everyone has to start somewhere. They definitely hadn't found their sound yet; singer/guitarist Goto Mariko growls on the opener like she's writing a screamo parody and then shrieks like a banshee on Romantikku Natsu Modo. Two of the better songs also appear on better releases, and the pop song is super boring, leaving the song about anal as the best song here. Oy vey! Luckily they got better by the time they released...

セカンド (Second)



This is more like it! If you only heard this album, you'd be missing out on so much but you'd still find yourself with three of their best songs: Love Song is more a song about the concept of love rather than a "love-song", Goto sings lyrics like "I was deceived about love/I was taken in my him", before raising her voice to a yell in the chorus. Smell Of The City is a gorgeous closer. But the best song is easily I Want To Hear Your Voice, But I Can't, and at this point I feel I should introduce you to Midori's pianist, Hajime. He occupies this strange middle ground where he sounds classically trained but plays like a lunatic, favouring chaos over precision, and STILL managing to write beautiful parts, especially on that song.

There are good moments elsewhere, like the piano riff to Doping Noise Noise Kiss, but their good-to-insufferable ratio was still a little off at this point, and so we get ridiculous moments like Goto yelling "yes I do, yes I DOOOOOOOOO". But you know what? Most of these songs are good. And it's a short album: only 32 minutes. Brevity would become one of their running themes.

Speaking of brevity, it's EP time.

清水 (Shimizu)


Yes, that T-shirt is official Midori merch. People are wearing that shirt right now.

Six songs here. Two of them are pretty irritating, so let's get those out of the way. Romantikku Natsu Modo originally appeared on First, and while it stood out on that EP, it's not great here. Ezojika Dansu is mostly howling and unpleasant, and not in the good ways that Midori specialise in. However, there are two cool moments: 1) when what sounds like a jet engine appears and utterly demolishes the band, and 2) the bouncy, fun bridge directly afterwards. Too bad these two moments had to appear in such a grating song!

The other four songs are cool. Love Is Sad is probably the purest dose of Midori you'll ever get, straight to the jugular. "ANTA O 1-BAN, ITOSHI TERU!" And then we get jazz-punk straight to the face. The Dog Runs is one of Goto's cooler moments on guitar, and the closer, Goodbye, is pleasant, fun and pretty adorable. That's three great Midori songs, which ain't bad.

But it's nothing compared to what happened next. NSFW album art on the way whoops too late

あらためまして、はじめまして、ミドリです。 (Hello Everyone, Nice To Meet You, We Are Midori)



Their 5-star masterpiece. I first saw the album art in a /mu/ thread and knew I had to investigate, thrusting me into the furious world of Midori. If I've been a little over-evangelical so far, I apologise but it might get even worse here.

This album toyed with me for a good 4 months. Various songs made me pumped, others made me feel dirty, others sounded beautiful in a way that knocked me out. The opener, Suki, is a delicate acoustic tune, designed to lull you into a false sense of security. Directly after that, the most iconic moment of any Midori song happens:

"DESTORAI"

at full volume, and then the band comes in and tears everything to shreds. For the rest of the song, Goto howls, gibbers and screams in ways that humans shouldn't be able to. She sounds freaking deranged. And this is the norm for the following 30 minutes: on the next song Sad Every Day she sounds like she tried to save a loved one from death, but couldn't. The other songs are less grim and more fun, and a few of them are even beautiful, like the cascading 5 Time. Honestly I realise I've been praising this guys a little TOO excessively, so in the interest of fairness I will say that the last track kinda sucks. But that's about it, everything else rules. Basically this is one of my desert island discs and I listen to it all the time. The intensity still hasn't worn off.

So a good album indeed! But did it hold up live?

ライブ!! (Live!!)



Spoilers: it did. All four members of the band at this point - that's Goto Mariko, Hajime, Kozen the naked drummer and Iwami the upright bassist - were furious performers. Goto in particular was a great frontwoman, playing guitar AND singing AND screaming her face off.

But no, this live EP isn't that great. The audio quality is crummy and Goto was clearly exhausted for a good few of these songs (who could blame her tbh?). I say skip it; there are several live videos on Youtube that do the band more justice. Especially this one:



Swing



By this point it was 2009, and they were basically at the top of their game. Little did anyone know they were already in their last stretch as a band. 2009 only saw the release of a live DVD (which I haven't seen yet), an absolutely terrible collab with Melon Kinenbi and a tiny inconspicuous single named Swing. I see it as more of an EP, since it contains 4 songs, three of which are among their absolute best.

Swing itself is beautiful, and another stellar moment for Hajime's piano work - it's him that keeps driving this song upwards. It feels like someone's pushing you WAY too high on a swing and you can't stop them, a very urgent song. Akan!! is a treat if you like Boredoms, which I do. And The End Of Decay features one of their absolute darkest piano riffs, it's really a song with a colossal gravitational pull.

Then 2009 came and went. Sometime in 2010 their breakup was announced, and all that was left to do was release their final album. How did it do?

Shinsekai



Oh it did well.

Shinsekai translates to "New World", but it's also the name of a district in Osaka, with one half modelled after New York and the other modelled after Paris. It's known for many things, including relative poverty, crime, a high homeless population, a flourishing transvestite community and what's known as "the Tower of Heaven". It's also where Goto Mariko grew up.

This is basically a pop album, but it's one that only Midori could make. By which I mean, there's grindcore all over the damn thing, but yet half the tracks are either blissful or catchy. Sayonara, Perfect World is a highlight easily, and an example of one of the noisier tracks; then there's Spring Mellow, a piano ballad in which Hajime gets lead vocals! He has such a soft voice, and it's great to hear him duet with Goto.

It's an interesting album because it really feels like a finale. Like they knew they had to go out with a bang, so they smoothed out all the kinks in their sound and just went for it. Every song feels climactic, like they're building to something. And the sense of closure even permeates the lyrics. Like, there's a stanza in the song Speed Beat which I translate as:

"Tomorrow, if the world is ending, sadness will disappear.
You do not choose me.
How, nice, if, if there is a continuation, I want to kiss in front of people,
Embrace until we break, I'm kidding, romantic"

It's one of the best lyrics Goto ever wrote, I think.

And then they broke up.

Where are they now?

Goto did what every frontman or frontwoman did and started a solo career, which hasn't really taken off yet. Hajime has put out an EDM EP under the name Hajimetal. As for Kozen and Iwami, who knows? I assume they took up desk jobs or something. The band as a whole performed their last concert, entitled Sayonara Goto-San, in late 2010. A DVD came out, and that DVD is the last Midori-related thing you can still buy.

So that's their 7 year run. If you're interested in what their music actually sounds like, sadly it was never printed in the States or the Kingdom, so you have three options: a) get a Japanese import, download their music from somewhere or c) listen to Youtube videos! I'm gonna list a few down below for that purpose. There's also a couple download links for parts of their catalogue.





http://lolhipsterslol.blogspot.co.uk/2011/06/midori.html - some Midori albums for download
http://japansmusicworld.blogspot.co.uk/2010/11/midori.html - much of the same

Have you ever had such a bad series of events where you would wind up into work the next day? Well, I certainly did last week. Long story short, it began as a pimple a few months ago, evolved due to a shaving accident, and had to be removed in surgery. I was patched up and went into work the next day. But what does this have to do with today’s episode?

Two words: Kevin Smith. While it should sum up the review, it doesn’t. It helps sum up the film that he made: Clerks. He first made this for just under $30,000 (not counting the post-production), and the movie went on to make $3,000,000, making it a box-office success, and a cult film in the eyes of many. It also won a couple of awards, made stars out of the debuting stars, spawned a franchise series, and even brought to life the View Askewniverse world, which couldn’t have been done without this movie. But all things considered and all things pushed aside, does it still hold up to this day? Let’s find out…

…The VHS Surprises…
Before we begin, I did not pick this up at the usual video shop that I visit frequently every Thursday. Nope, I picked it up at a School sale in Narrabeen (they only have them once every three months), which actually had a variety of Videocassettes there. I also bought two Michael Jackson videocassettes (one of which released by CEL Home Video), Jailhouse Rock (which sadly doesn’t work), Lord of the Rings – The Two Towers, a special Top Gear DVD, and a limited edition of the Pokemon Black & White Strategy Guide/Pokedex.

Anyway, The movie was released on video by 21^st Century Pictures (no relation to 21^st Century Fox or 21^st Century Film Corporation) sometime in the 90s with help from NewVision, and was rated R, despite the ‘medium level coarse language’. It was rated MA in 2008, but subsequently returned to the R rating soon after for some reason. It also features the accolades and comments the film has received, which include:

• The ‘Filmmaker’s Trophy Award’ (Sundance ’94)
• The ‘International Critics Week’ (Cannes ’94)
• “The Comedy Event of the Year!” – Rolling Stone (Peter Travers)
• “…let’s just say it’s a hard film not to like.” – Newsweek (Halloween ’94)
• “Howlingly Funny!” – Paper Magazine (Dennis Darmody)
• “A Grunge movie par excellence!” – Variety (Todd McCarthy)

The sole disappointment with the cover is that it’s in white, and there's a slight rip with the VHS logo on the slick. While it does seem bland, it does help the praise, pictures, and even the various fonts stand out.

The videocassette, on the other hand, tells a different story. While it is unique that part of the videocassette and the front sticker had gold text to stand out, the top sticker is missing (which normally features the text in gold for some reason), there are remnants of a barcode sticker, the ‘Video Ezy’ Security Sticker is hanging on by a thread, and the front sticker has seen better days. And I also learned something (which was well before I bought this Videocassette); if there is a side that says ‘VOID’ repeatedly until it runs out of space in the small rectangle, it means that someone removed the security sticker.


Credit goes to danielgonline for this informative anti-piracy message. I'd take that over any other piracy ad every day, regardless of how sudden it pops up.

Well, when I popped it in, the first thing I saw, after a void of black for 21 seconds, we see a regular that appeared on many Australian videocassettes. Unlike other modern anti-piracy ads (including the "YOU WOULDN'T STEAL A CAR" piracy ad), this one is more upfront, which gives you time to read, as the announcer reads as if he was telling a story to a child. Following that, we get a ‘Copy Protected’ logo on a light blue screen before we see the mandatory black warning screen.

And after 110 seconds, the 21^st Century Pictures logo appears… and it looks cheesy at best, placated on a black/purple background, with the gold engravings set on a marble background. Without any indications, the movie brings us the first preview – All Men are Liars (rated PG, Coming Soon), which tells the story of a young man who crossdresses as a girl, with interesting results. The next is called ‘Spanking the Monkey’ (Rated R, Coming Soon) which, I guess, tells the story of a son trying to take of his mother, while doing a series of tasks to balance.


Credit goes to Evan Lewis for the logo. See the logo for yourself and you be the judge.

The third preview, after a moment of Italian language, we find out that the movie is called ‘Queen Margot’ (La Reine Margot, Rated MA, Coming Soon), where she is forced to live a life of an unconvincing marriage, as the St. Bartholomew’s war takes place five days later. The next is a more raunchy film named ‘Redheads’ (Rated M, Coming Soon), though it does have an interesting mix of crime in the trailer. I do hope it turns out well, if I ever have the chance to watch it.

The fifth preview is entitled ‘Public Enemy No. 1’ (Rated R, Coming Soon), with Ma Barker as the Public Enemy, battling against the FBI, which sounds like an interesting drama movie. Also, I swear that the announcer is Don LaFontaine, who had a history lending his voice to many Cannon film trailers. The sixth is Somebody to Love (Rated M, Coming Soon), featuring the late Anthony Quinn, who also appeared in the Schwarzenegger-starring box office flop Last Action Hero.

And the last film on offer is Erotique (Rated R, Coming Soon), which is exactly what it is. If you don’t know why its rated R, well, a lot of nude bodyparts are in that film, and a comment claims that the film ‘goes all the way’, so I’ll leave it at that. And finally, we see the Ratings Advice trailer, which was another common thing that appeared, showcasing a couple of films, including Back to the Future, Part III and Terminator 2. And we get to see the warning, Rated R, with only coarse language mentioned.


Credit goes to TakingofPelhamify for the logo. It is without a doubt, the most jarringly animated logo ever made in my opinion.

And then we get to possibly the worse thing that could start off the movie. We see a clown walking to a changeroom, where there’s a child that looks a lot like Carl Wheezer’s cousin playing ball. He his pet by the clown before he infamously changes into something that you wouldn’t want to see a bald fat man wearing. With the changeroom falling, it segues to the logo title ‘View Askew Productions’. To me, it just seems downright nightmarish.

But after that image people would try to repress, we then get to the movie, which is in black and white throughout, and centering on Dante with the nine rings of hell, amongst other main characters including Jay and Silent Bob. Speaking of which, the movie soon features its soundtrack, featuring a series of grunge-rock bands, including (as the VHS showcases):

• Bad Religion
• Soul Asylum
• Alice in Chains
• Seaweed
• The Jesus Lizard

The movie also brings us the inspiration of Carl from Family Guy, who I honestly thought that he was absolutely bland, unlike Dante, who has much more range than Carl.


Credit goes to daculto for the trailer. According to the brief introductory that lasts 16 seconds, a person who goes by the name Matthew Cohen made the trailer not only for this, but also for Pulp Fiction.

And now the most important part: The ending. I’m aware that Clerks has a tale of two endings, one of which was the original, and the other being cut short. In the end, I was given the short straw, as the music starts playing when Randal throws the sign at Dante. And with the relatively short credits, and the opening previews included, the movie is in fact 103 minutes. However, the copy I got features the theatrical trailer for Clerks (after you wait about 20 seconds in the Australian VHS), as it finally closes with the statement: “Open for business this October”, which is somewhat a compromise as an easter egg.

And now, my thoughts on Clerks. The major flaw with this film is obviously what Swap Meet and This is Spinal Tap have suffered with: A lack of plot. Other than that, it is definitely an interesting movie, with Kevin Smith doing a remarkably good job for his first run as director. And the fact that the movie is in black and white just makes the film stand out even more.

Final Score
VHS Cover: 8.5/10 – The sole downside is the white background of the VHS cover.
Videocassette: 6/10 – It appears to be missing a couple of things, such as the top label and the ‘Security Sticker’ that says ‘VOID’ Repeatedly.
Quality: 6.5/10 – Consistent small dots of white and minor parts of flickering is what brought the VHS down slightly.
Warning: 8.5/10 – Features the ‘HAVE YOU GOT WHAT YOU PAID FOR’ ad, the ‘Ratings Advice’ ad, the ‘Copy Protection’ warning screen, and the Warning screen that has appeared on Australian Non-CIC Universal Videocassettes.
Logo: 3/10 – The 21^st Century Pictures logo is cheesy, whilst the ‘View Askew’ logo looks haunting.
Previews/Other Features: 9/10 – Seven films. That’s one way to start off a Videocassette.
Final Score: 41.5/60 – Good. I’m surprised that an unknown VHS company has scored such a good mark with the Videocassette, but it does almost everything right, including the previews and the VHS Cover.

It is going to be a long blog entry so hold tight, grab on to your seat and experience the lesser known of the 6th generation consoles.

Well, hopefully I shouldn't be able to explain since many might have a fair idea already however just in case. The Xbox was a console made by Microsoft, it was their first attempt at a console themselves (before there was the MSX and they helped Sega during the Dreamcast to the point where the Xbox feels like a Dreamcast 2 in some ways), was launched in 2001 in the US, 2002 elsewhere and carried on until 2006 in Europe, later in the US due to MS released the 360 [this was because the original Xbox lost MS lots of money] and the story goes... While it wasn't popular compared to the PS2, it still managed to beat the Gamecube in sales however the tides have turned and the Xbox just become forgotten over time. It flopped big time in Japan and they were put off by future Xbox consoles. Doesn't help that Microsoft called their 3rd console Xbox One and some people just call the 360, the Xbox (annoying though) so what do people call the console now? Either original Xbox [MS term] or OG Xbox.

Now let's get a misconception out of the way. First of all, it isn't just a Halo machine even if the game made the console popular and the sequel skyrocketed the popularity of online gameplay on consoles. Rather it is machine designed for a player who likes Western games since the types of games were shooters of both the FPS and the TPS kind, racing, open world and sports similar to how the PS4/Xbox One are like at the moment (concidence that both the original Xbox and these have little platfomers and RPGs, the latter will change when Square-Enix, NIS and Atlus will come to the table for the PS4 though).



Sorry about that, couldn't resist. Anyway let's talk about the good and the bad things about this console.

Advantages to the Xbox:
+ Was the most powerful console of the 6th generation era so as a result, in general the multiplatform games look better whether it is clearer textures, more effects, better draw distance, better sound (Dolby Digital support) and a better more consistant frame rate on games with less slowdown. Some like Splinter Cell are more closer to the PC releases rather than the competition (even though I do think the Gamecube release could have done better) and makes it look like a mini generation leap by comparison. There are a few exceptions however where the PS2 version or the Gamecube version is better though or minimal work done such as Call of Duty: Finest Hour.
+ The first console to have a hard drive, all home consoles after this have some on board storage. This means that you won't be needing memory cards or worrying about lack of space since 8GB can save a fair amount of games. There is also a memory card that you can buy to save to the controller ala the Dreamcast however many developers only allow saves to the HDD, also handy for the Splinter Cell Mod.
+ Custom soundtracks (if game supports it), like the hard drive was more featured in the 360/PS3 era. It technically wasn't the first to do so since Ridge Racer on the PS1, you could change your disc to change the music since the entire game stored to the memory however it is safer. Say you are fed up of Gravity Bounce on Project Gotham Racing or want to your favourite song on GTA 3/Vice City/San Andreas? No problem, just select it.
+ 720p. That's right, the Xbox was the first HD console that could support HD resolutions even though most people back then only had 480p/480i/575i support on their TVs. The PAL systems don't have it by default and is restricted to a few games with the big one being Soul Calibur II but it is a nice thing to have for a console this old.
+ Quick to load the games in most cases apart from a few games. Some like Halo and Everything or Nothing have no load times after the level is loaded so when you die or in the case of Halo continuing from the last checkpoint from a fresh load, it is pretty much instant. I don't know whether the Gamecube is faster or slower than the Xbox for loading (personally put it around the same ball park depending on game) but having a game to load 30 seconds max generally is better than a minute or so. Some multiplatform games like Crash Bandicoot 4 or the Max Payne series while do have loading times are much faster than the PS2 releases of these games even though the former got a loading fixed Platinum/Greatest Hits release.

Previous advantages:
+ Was the first console to take online multiplayer seriously. While playing online can go as far back as the Xband or the few supported Saturn and Dreamcast games, the Xbox took it to the next level by having an ethernet socket as well as no extras needed like the PS2 or the Gamecube. Plus in terms of Europe, it was the first console to actually have online multiplayer on more than just a few games (technically the Dreamcast WAS the first however many games removed the online features for the PAL versions such as Daytona USA 2001 or weren't released such as Bomberman Online). Reason why it is previous? The online servers have been switched off for 5 years.
+ Relating to that, it also had DLC on some games. Like the online bit, wasn't the first to do it but many games did take advantage by offering more maps, more levels and more music for free. The sad part is that much of this DLC is lost... Some like the Halo 2 maps had their own disc for retail, some like Splinter Cell had an extra disc for the budget release for that level. Some of these might have also made to demo discs but good luck finding the one that you want. This problem might repeat itself when the PS3/360 switch off their online servers in the future. The Xbox would have also would have been the first to have downloadable games but didn't happen until the 360.

Disadvantages to the Xbox (keeping neutral):
- No released English translated JRPGs on the system so anyone who loves them, stick to the PS2 of the 6th generation era or a different console (e.g. 3DS/Vita/PS3/360). The only RPGs are Shin Megumi Tensei Nine and Rent a Hero no. 1 released only in Japan, the latter did have a prototype English translated version though.
- Relating to that, less Japanese developed games. While it isn't as big issue today due to the rise and more popularity of Western developers however back in this era, the Xbox got the scraps while the PS2 and to a much smaller extent the Gamecube (only because of Nintendo themselves) got the cream of the crop. Should be considered lucky that Sega and Tecmo were huge supporters of the system with Capcom, Koei, SNK and Konami having some of their better games on it, even Namco had an exclusive or two and Namco was really close to Sony to the point where Sony published most of Namco's games in Europe until the late 00s. Due to this it is also missing some big series on the console such as Resident Evil, Viewtiful Joe, Mega Man (except an US only compliation), Tekken, Ace Combat, Ridge Racer, Final Fantasy (no Square), Bomberman (no Hudson) with many took until the 360 before these series appeared on a Microsoft console.
- The console itself is as big as an American stereotype, then again it was a consolised PC and having computer parts in consoles in a smaller form wasn't possible unlike now.
- The Thomson drive consoles. You see early Xbox systems had Thomson drives that weren't reliable that meant the lasers were poor and from my experience (have two Xbox systems) couldn't read dual layer discs at all like Ninja Gaiden, Dead or Alive 2 Ultimate (not even a single scratch on the disc!) or GTA 3 while the Samsung one read them just fine. Microsoft replaced them two years later with better ones but still possible to find them. Easiest way of looking is by the tray, covering most of the tray? Thomson. Having circluar holes? Samsung.
- There is no perfect controller on the system. The original aka the DUKE is big, has an iffy D-pad but the layout is similar to the older Sega controllers as in the 6 button layout. The Controller S is smaller and a better fit with a better D-Pad however the layout got shuffled making the black and white buttons below the A button as well as shifting Start and Back to the lower left below the left analog stick, not ideal if the games are tailored for the older layout.

This was the best time to get the console; I started this two years ago out of curiousity since when I was younger the console didn't exist and ending up getting a bundle with 10 games [Sonic Heroes, F1 2002, Need for Speed: Most Wanted, Burnout 3: Takedown, Burnout Revenge that ended up failing, The Simpsons Hit and Run, MotoGP 1, Mad Dash Racing, Colin McRae Rally 3 and Rocky] so already got my monies worth. Then first thing I did was went to the various Computer Exchanges, Cash Converters, car boot sales, even Game for Pro Evolution Soccer 5 and got plenty of games on the cheap. Of course some of these I took back since they didn't work or in the case of car boots got replacements further down the line. To top it off, went to Amazon to buy some of the remaining games, the harder to find ones. Now apart from a perhaps a few non-essential games, I have all the games that I want on the system, about 160 games. This year though, I did notice that I got them at the right time since said stores are really downsize their stock and lucky to get the common games now as well as car boot sales being really poor for games in general lately, it will be a matter of time before the stores will stop selling them and end up like various retro consoles with the price of the games shooting right up.

Personal story aside, it still is the best time to get the console since when compared to the Gamecube, Dreamcast and many PS2 games, the games are much cheaper to buy. To be honest right now, PS3 and Wii games (plus 360) have dropped in price a lot with some even being cheaper than Xbox games in 2015 so start buying those while you can! However it is cheaper to buy the Splinter Cell games on the Xbox rather than the PS3 trilogy due to having access to all 4 games, no performance problems and an extra level in the first game. I'll predict that by 2016, the games will be worth more at least for certain titles and even some might double their value or more (e.g. RalliSport Challenge 2, Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory, OutRun 2, Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay).

Right so you have looked at all the points and why it is the best time to get one but what about the games and for a first time buyer?

First thing you want to do is buy the console and make sure that it works. It is up to you whether you want to go regular black or Crystal colour. When buying a system, make sure that it doesn't have a Thomson drive since they have problems reading discs even though ironically are better at reading copies than genuine games. Go with Samsung or for an August 2005 console, Hitachi. At the bottom of the console, there is a serial code. If it is before 1.6 then your capacitator might want replacing however 1.6 has a weaker video encoder and might have problems displaying certain games. Your console might have a mod chip so it can play copies, imports (but if you are in the US, you are in the best region for this console or not really needed) and for EU systems, display in 720p. Some have even modded their console with larger HDDs to store games and stuff. Now there is something that you can do on a system, I haven't done it or have the skills to do it but it is the Splinter Cell mod. When buying it is also best to get a bundle, that way you have a few games to play on.

So follow my advice afterwards, go to a store or online and start with the cheap games or as many as you can find that you will like (I started getting around 8 or 10 games at a time, at the end dropped to the odd one). The common games, even if it is that a 50c sports game (to your tests that is), a game from EA or a game that you are unsure about (there is a guide below on some recommendations) start with. Then work your way though waiting until you find a good price or the game that you are looking for or both. Most importantly unless you are a hardcore collector, just go for games that you'll like, like I did. You would save some money and get to enjoy the system.

What is the Splinter Cell mod?

This is softmod that can do what a mod chip does. All you need is a copy of Splinter Cell and the game easy to find so no problems there (this mod also works on certain print runs of Agent Under Fire and MechWarrior), a memory card and a USB to Xbox cable (or an Action Replay or an Xploder) and a save of Splinter Cell with your region. Put the save to the memory card, load Splinter Cell, load the Linux save and there you go. A softmodded console.

Best picture connection?

Get component cables straight away after buying your system (unless they come with it). It is the best that the Xbox can get and would work whether you have a CRT [with them on] or a LCD tv. On Modern TVs, SCART (considered the best for some old consoles) doesn't make the picture look good on the system. It makes them like a really blurry dull vaseline look and adds extra lag making the games feel slower than they are. With component, they are sharper, cleaner, easier to make out the graphics but have a slight blur like an unintended anti analysing hiding some of the imperfections (good thing). If you have an older TV (pre 2000s), then SCART/Composite have to be the way to go.

So when are we going to get to the games?

Now. The ones written in Xbox green are exclusive to the console and are my pick of recommendations (* - one of my favourites). The console had about 700 games plus (estimated 999 games in total for all regions), not bad for a system that was 4 years in its peak however there are more games out there than listed, just unsure of their quality. Plus this doesn't list JP imports such as Metal Wolf Chaos, Double Steal: The Second Clash [Wreckless 2], NUDE, SMT Nine, Dinosaur Hunting or any of those due to not only lack of availablity (+ high demand on Metal Wolf Chaos) but also most importantly the language barrier.

Speaking of which most Xbox games are region locked however there are a few that aren't such as Taito Legends 2, one version of RalliSport Challenge 2 and going from memory OutRun 2006.

FPS

007: Nightfire
Call of Duty 2: Big Red One
Call of Duty 3
Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay
Counter-Strike
Far Cry Instincts/Instincts Evolution (altered versions of the first game, both are similar and have the same story but have different missions in single player)
Halo
Halo 2
Mace Griffin Bounty Hunter
Medal of Honor: European Assault
Medal of Honor: Frontline
Project Snowblind (got it cheap)
Return to Castle Wolfenstein
TimeSplitters 2
TimeSplitters: Future Perfect
Unreal Championship
XIII

Racing

Burnout 3: Takedown*
Burnout Revenge
Colin McRae Rally 2005
Forza Motorsport
Need for Speed: Hot Pursuit 2
Project Gotham Racing
Project Gotham Racing 2
Quantum Redshift
Racing Evoluzione / Apex
RalliSport Challenge 2
Richard Burns Rally (most hardcore rally game ever made)
Sega GT Online (Sega GT 2002 with extra races and more events)
Sonic Riders (sadly the best Sonic game that isn't Mega Collection Plus on the system)
The Italian Job: LA Heist
TOCA Race Driver 2 (Race Driver 1 Live if you want a story, 2 for gameplay)
Wreckless: The Yakuza Missions (PS2 and Gamecube versions are really cutdown)
XGRA: Xtreme G Racing Association (very hard though)

(Noticed a pattern?)

Third Person Shooter/Action game

Dead to Rights (part exclusive, original version of the game)
Everything or Nothing
From Russia with Love
Freedom Fighters
Max Payne*
Max Payne 2: The Fall of Max Payne*

Tactical shooter

Conflict Desert Storm 1 & 2 (very cheap)
Full Spectrum Warrior (ditto)
Ghost Recon 2/Summit Strike (remember when companies released expansion packs retail?)
Rainbow Six 3/Black Arrow
Star Wars Battlefront
Star Wars: Republic Commando

Unable to source Operation Flashpoint and that is apparently one of the best tactical shooters on the system

Other action games

Ailen Hominid
Beyond Good and Evil (have it on the PS3 though)
Breakdown
Dynasty Warriors 5
Fable: The Lost Chapters
Genma Onimusha (part exclusive)
Gunvalkyrie
Indiana Jones and the Emperor's Tomb
Jade Empire
Jet Set Radio Future
Lego Star Wars II: The Original Trilogy
Lord of the Rings: Return of the King
Mercenaries
Oddworld: Stranger's Wrath (have it on the Vita)
Ninja Gaiden / Ninja Gaiden Black (up to you, have both since they have their differences)
Panzer Dragoon Orta
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time*
Psi-Ops: The Mindgate Conspiracy
Samurai Warriors
SpikeOut: Battlestreet
Splinter Cell: Chaos Theory (the others are also worth picking up too and Double Agent is better than the HD version)
SpyHunter
Star Wars Jedi Knight 2
Star Wars Jedi Academy
The Warriors

While Metal Gear Solid 2: Substance is a good game, there are better versions on the PS3/360 and only got it because it was cheap. Headhunter: Redemption got a bad reputation but if you find it cheap it is worth a try. At least it has a good soundtrack. Also there's Starsky and Hutch if you want an arcade style game, sort of like Special Criminal Investigation and I think there's also a Lucky and Wild mode where one controls the car and the other controls the gun.

Fighting (non-arcade)

Dead or Alive 3
Dead or Alive Ultimate (Saturn version of the original, remake of Dead or Alive 2)

Platformers (warning: not many)

Blinx: The Time Sweeper (from the creator of Sonic) and its sequel
Crash Bandicoot: The Wrath of Cortex
Rayman 3: Hoodlum Havoc
ToeJam and Earl 3 (considered a disappointment at the time when compared to the others in the series, on its own grounds it is actually a decent game)

Apparently Crash Twinsanity is a good one and the Ty series seem decent however unable to get them (my Ty 2 disc didn't work at all, took it back for a refund and unable to source another copy at the moment).

Open World (whether it is action or racing)

Grand Theft Auto Double Pack (GTA 3 and Vice City*)
The Godfather*
Mafia
Midnight Club 3: Dub Edition Remix (Midnight Club II is also decent)
Midtown Madness 3
Need for Speed: Most Wanted / Need for Speed Carbon
Simpsons Hit and Run
Spider-Man 2
True Crime: Streets of LA

Apparently The Incredible Hulk: Ultimate Destruction is a very good game but unable to personally recommend it due to not having it.

Flying (ala Ace Combat)

Crimson Skies
Deadly Skies / AirForce Delta Storm
Yager

Sports

American BIG TIME Football - NFL 2K5 (apparently is the best one, not into the sport or have it but seems to be the general opinion)
Basketball - NBA Street Vol. 2
Boxing - Fight Night 1, 2 or 3, Rocky
Football/Soccer - Pro Evolution Soccer 5/Winning Eleven 9 [KING OF ALL FOOTBALL GAMES]
Golf - Links
Tennis - Top Spin (only option really)
Skateboarding - Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 2x (US only), 3 and 4
Snowboarding - SSX Tricky, SSX 3
Volleyball - Only one option but it is too embarrassing to say it...

Not sure regarding baseball though. The only one released in Europe was All-Star Baseball 2003 however the US also had sequels and World Series Baseball.

Arcade Ports/Emulation

Arctic Thunder
Capcom vs. SNK 2 EO
Crazy Taxi 3 (now was this first on the Xbox or the arcade?)
Gauntlet Dark Legacy
House of the Dead 3 [with 2 as an unlockable]
Metal Slug 3
Midway Arcade Treasures 3
OutRun 2 [with OutRun as an unlockable]
OutRun 2006: Coast 2 Coast**
Silent Scope Complete
Smashing Drive (US only)
Soul Calibur II
Street Fighter Anniversary Collection (Hyper Street Fighter II and Street Fighter III Third Strike)
Taito Legends 2 (EU only)

The Rest
Commandos 2: Men of Courage
Super Monkey Ball Deluxe
Ultimate Pro Pinball

Also there are Conker, Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic 1 & 2, Battlefront 2 and Shenmue II however for the Star Wars ones, it is cheaper elsewhere (PC, PSP) plus KOTOR also have mods especially the 2nd with its mod to expand the game due to being rushed out of the door and the other two are pricey.
If anyone is curiousity, these are the availablity of the games. Please note that this is from my personal experience and may not completely reflect the rarity of a game even though it is a good try (spoilered due to length):



Lastly is there an emulator of the system?

Sadly no and from the looks of things, there isn't going to be one for a LONG time. There have been a couple of attempts however they are lucky if they boot up one game. The closest thing to an emulator is the 360 where it can run some Xbox games but they have problems with Panzer Dragoon Orta crashing by Stage 3 or missing graphical effects or slowdown (Jet Set Radio Future). Only hope is if MAME gets OutRun 2 fully working, then the work on MESS can start on the Xbox since the arcade Chirhiro system is based on the Xbox.

Why?

At first glance, the Xbox is a consolised PC but going deeper and it doesn't turn out that way. The major hurdle is actually the graphics card used on the system. While it is based on the GeoForce series, it isn't quite compatible and documentation of it is lost. Meaning that it would require someone really skilled, lots of guess work and lots of time to reverse engineer the graphics card. Another is that it uses X86 rather like a computer or the PS4/Xbox One and there are a lot of instructions (unknown how many the system actually uses), some of them not documented and some really tied to MS so in order to emulate the console, it will be like emulating a computer and it is harder than it looks. Maybe also copyright restrictions since it uses DirectX (hence the Xbox name).

Another thing also is lack of interest. With Nintendo consoles, there is usually a hook whether it is a Mario or a Zelda game to get motivation to emulate a system and the first working game is usually between the two (like there is a new 3DS emulator that can emulator Ocarina of Time and only just started). With Sony consoles, there are the RPGs and certain series even though weirdly the PS3 emulator so far is only able to emulate simple puzzle games on PSN and very early days. With Microsoft consoles there isn't either or a strong enough title to start. if there is going to be a MS console emulator, it is most likely going to be the 360. With the popularity of FROM Software (Metal Wolf Chaos) and Atlus (SMT Nine), there might be a small chance of someone finding motivation to play these games.

So there you go, a rough guide to the Xbox and hope that it can help you if you ever decide to try it out.

That small black Optimus Prime there? He costs twice as much as the one behind him these days.

Being that I'm posting this on an internet forum centered around video remixes of (typically) old cartoons, it'd be at least mostly accurate to say that everybody here has experienced the thought process of "Hmm. I like that character. I would like an action figure of him". Most of the time these are characters who have existed before the concept of making toys of them was brought to light, be they cartoon, movie, comic, or even video game characters. However, Transformers (and like-minded franchises such as G.I. Joe and Bionicle) flips that prospect on it's head by creating toys, and following up with various forms of media based around them. This has earned most Transformers media the unsavory reputation of being a "glorified toy commercial" and while at times that description is apt, it serves to discredit the media itself - be it comics, cartoons etc. - which, depending on which you're talking about, can be quite excellent (see: anything involving Simon Furman). That said, since Transformers is initially a toy selling enterprise, many Transfans (we are aware of how the term sounds) indulge in recreational,- and in some cases obsessive - collecting of Hasbro's figures. The question is "Why". Why do we indulge in the blatant "This character is cool! You must buy him!" marketing Hasbro delivers on a regular basis? Well, for one it's fun.


Oh, what fun

If you're really going to tell me you don't know what Transformers are, I should smack you upside the head. The appeal of Transformers, especially for children, is that you aren't just getting a robot toy, and you aren't just getting a toy plane/car/monkey. You get both (in some cases, more than just two things), and while this is predominantly to appeal to children, adult collectors like myself also often find entertainment in shifting around all the bits and pieces to see how they fold away into another shape. In fact, in recent years, Hasbro has seen fit to release figures that are incredibly complex in their transformation schemes aimed at older fans. It is, in essence, a puzzle in the form of an action figure. The puzzle description works two ways as well since, like a puzzle, you have an idea of what the end result should be in either vehicle mode or robot mode, and Hasbro's enclosed instruction books are often (see: always) woefully lacking in detail resulting in the end user being forced to figure it out for themselves.

There's also the appeal to mecha collectors. Obviously the Transformers are robots and, for lack of a better way of putting it, robots are cool. Their ability to shapeshift into other forms also greatly influences their outward appearance as robots. A fine example is the Armada franchise's version of Megatron who Transforms into an H-Tank. The resulting robot has giant shoulders made from tank treads, and a backpack made from a turret with the cannon slung under his arm against his torso. With the coming of the Michael Bay movie franchise even more unique and bizarre robot designs came to light like the shovel-handed unicycle monstrosity that is Demolishor. There is also the small sub-sect of collectors who buy the figures for their vehicle modes (I don't get it either) and Hasbro has seen fit to cater to them with astonishingly complex, yet life-accurate vehicle modes in the Alternators and Human Alliance lines.

All different guys. I swear.

Of course, not all is peachy in the world of Transformer collecting. Being mass-produced toys aimed at children, Hasbro doesn't have the time to create all new characters once the old ones have stopped selling. Instead, Hasbro will usually opt to end a line (and, in-turn, any associated media) as abruptly as possible (We miss you Animated) to make way for a new one. That's right, get ready for an all new, totally different Optimus Prime and Bumblebee (or similar substitute) with a brand-spanking new figure to boot. As such, if the newer media turns out to be really good, collectors will be compelled to buy a figure of this "new" character, resulting in owning multiple similar-looking or same-named figures (I have 9 Optimus Primes, 5 Megatrons, 3 Starscreams, 3 Demolishors, 2 Shockwaves, and 2 Ultra Magnus'). Similarly, in-between media in the same continuity characters will often "upgrade" in the form of a new paint-job, or a completely new design. The Bay-verse Megatron has had a completely new body in each different movie! This can cause headaches, or poverty, for collectors trying to get "true" version of the character.

All the same guy. I swear.

There's also the concept of show-accuracy. In other words, finding the toy that most accurately represents the character's on-screen appearance. With the Japanese-created franchises like Robots In Disguise and The Unicron Trilogy this wasn't an issue given the cartoon's obsessive attention to detail in recreating the toy's appearances and features. However, the movie franchise, as well as the more recent Animated and Prime series of cartoons have delivered multiple figures of the same character, and it can be somewhat harrowing to nail down exactly which toy you feel best represents the character.

I guess some of him is better than none of him.

Combiners, while awesome in theory, add a whole extra layer to the madness. Did you get a kick out of that one badass part of Fall of Cybertron where Bruticus tears through a giant Energon carrier? Did you want a figure of that guy? Well, have fun buying FIVE FIGURES to get him. Generally, figures who form components of a combiner aren't terribly expensive (buying the component figures of Combiner Wars Menasor is 75$ total) but having to hunt down multiple figures can be a daunting task in it's own right. Even worse, if you just happen to be a fan of one of the characters who simply forms a component of a combiner, the individual figure will often be inferior to a standalone character. Overload, for example, has absolutely no articulation outside of basic forward and back arm movement, but hey at least he can turn into a big ass gun to mount on Optimus Prime's shoulders (characters who combine with Optimus Prime are notorious for having bricks for figures).

Ultimately, collecting Transformers is an easy hobby to get into, but it's equally easy to fall into the nasty habit of overspending, or winding up with a figure you didn't really want. Transformers are particularly cheap as far as collectible action figures go, so the temptation is very real. If you do get into collecting Transformers as I have, I have a few bits of advice. First, avoid the notion of completing sets (unless you're hunting down one of the aforementioned combiner figures). It may sound real cool to have all of the Autobots and Decepticons from a particular series, but if there are any characters you didn't like in that series why would you buy them for the sake of completeness? Second, if you're on the fence about a figure, do research, watch reviews on YouTube (I personally would recommend peaugh or emgo), look up images. You don't want to wind up with a figure you end up hating. Lastly, if you're buying a figure from a franchise that's been over for a while now, avoid eBay or Amazon and buy directly from fellow collectors (tfw2005.com has a ton of great people to buy from). You're much more likely to find a reasonable price.

Anyway, I doubt many people are going to be persuaded into buying Transformers due to this post, but I figured I'd share my insights on the hobby, and hopefully anyone who reads this enjoys it or looks into possible collecting ventures.

Love is a wonderful thing, except if you ask a songwriter who needs a grievance to write a song about. Then, it is The Worst Thing In The World. In many songs, women are demons sent straight down the Valhalla Expressway and getting off at Exit 69, pulling into the small town of A Guy's Heart and stopping for a bite to eat before heading back down the expressway, which is in a looping configuration so the same thing happens all over again with some other dude.

Presumably, these songs are used to drive into people's heads the fact that women can, indeed, be stone-cold bitches. Here are five examples of this theme dating back a few decades.


1. Ruby, "Ruby, Don't Take Your Love To Town" (Kenny Rogers and the First Edition)



Right from the start of this song, we get a bad feeling about this Ruby gal. The male narrator (we will refer to him as Kenny) appears to know exactly what her putting on some makeup and doing her hair means. It's date night on the town! Oh...right. Date night without Kenny. That kinda sucks.

But then the next verse...this is where shit really starts getting real. You see, Kenny here is a veteran of a "crazy Asian war" (specific, right?) that has left him somewhat fucked up. And here's his gal Ruby, blatantly going out to mingle with other fellows, while Kenny here has his PTSD to keep him company. C'mon, Ruby. Do you think it's a good idea to cheat on a vet? Kenny just needs some company.

Oh, wait a moment. He's paralyzed too. And traumatized from the Crazy Asian War. And dying, apparently. And being cheated on. Ruby you cold-hearted bitch. Kenny even says he realizes your needs, but that doesn't mean that 1) he is giving you permission to fuck around with someone else, and 2) that you should take advantage of that.

So what does Ruby do? She ignores the pleas of her PTSD-stricken, paralyzed, traumatized, being-cheated-on partner and leaves, literally slamming the door in Kenny's face. This is the 101st time this has happened to Kenny and he seems to have had enough.

This song ends on the verge of poetic justice, as Kenny sure sounds like he is about to make good on that proposition to "get (his) gun and put (Ruby) in the ground". Again, letting the paralyzed veteran operate a gun near someone who he really really hates: NOT a good idea.

Sadly, we don't find out what becomes of Ruby. However, Kenny eventually overcame his paralysis (is that possible? -ed.) and went on to found a successful chain of chicken restaurants, possibly including Ruby as part of the menu. Care for a breast or a thigh, anyone?

2. The Woman, "Requiem" (The Chocolate Watch Band)



We start this song in the middle of an odd situation. Somehow. the guy heretofore known as CWB Narrator is at the mercy of The Woman. In a rather domme-like fashion, she tells him to fall prostrate and beg for her forgiveness, and maybe she will accept it. Being in Please Don't Leave Me Mode, CWB Narrator immediately obeys. The Woman, however, smiles and walks away. You can practically hear the smirk on her face.

In the midst of a couple of "oh no"s and "baby please don't go"s, The Woman prepares to make her exit for good. But she has the nerve to belittle CWB one last time - calling him "young man" - and that's enough to set him off. It's not clear whether it's an act of desperation/passion or rage, but CWB grabs The Woman and pulls her to the ground, where she hits her head. Immediately realizing his mistake, he starts saying "oh no" a few times again.

The next verse is in Latin and has not yet been translated, but presumably it deals with CWB Narrator calling an ambulance, The Woman recovering, and then The Woman taking CWB to court and CWB getting royally fucked by the justice system. This is purely speculation.

However, the song ends with a revelation of just how much of a cold-hearted twatwaffle The Woman is. CWB has been locked up in some sort of insane asylum "that's very dim, although the walls are wide". His only friend is the man who brings him stew - and even he is just "alright too". As if being tormented by The Woman and The Woman's Lawyer and The Justice System In General wasn't enough, to add insult to injury, he has nightmares about her and wakes up screaming "oh no" and "don't go". Hopefully it does not annoy the man in blue who brings him stew too much.


3. The Girl, "Hell Will Take Care Of Her" (The Brass Buttons)



What a cheerful tune! Don't put on your sandals and find the nearest frolic-prone dandelion field just yet, though. Beneath the cheery exterior lies a description of someone who appears to be straight out of the Bitch Club.

Like about fifty million other girls in songs of this genre, this one likes to play with the hearts of her lovers. But The Girl goes farther than that. She's so cold-hearted, apparently, that she controls her emotions at will to get what she wants out of whoever's pining for her. "Though her eyes are blue, her heart's as black as night," croons Mr. Lead Singer. Her heart is also "cold as wine", which she should probably see a doctor about.

It seems that The Girl prefers emotional outbursts to verbal attacks in the category of How To Hurt A Guy That Cares For You. Fortunately, Mr. Lead Singer warns you, the listener, about it in advance, advising you to "leave her now and hurt her with your exit plan". It's like a Pokemon battle, but with a girl. I think. Like using Self-Destruct or...something like that. Yes.

Anyway, she's so set in her ways that nothing except hell can bring her down. That's assuming that she can die, which we're not even 100% sure about, and assuming that she's religious, which is pretty unlikely. Maybe a more appropriate title would be "A Mashy Spike Plate Will Take Care Of Her".


4. The Princess, "Princess Of The Gingerland" (The Glitterhouse)



Finally, a song that's not about cheating or lying or serving someone's body parts at a chicken restaurant. This one is in some sort of...gingerland, whatever that entails. There are sparrows that can talk, and also fairies. Make of that what you will.

You know what I envision whenever I listen to this song, which (mercifully) is not very often? "The Magic Lollipop Adventure". It's this horrible cartoon that involves a lollipop, a dragon, some royalty, and GUITARS. Here, I'll link it right here so you know what I mean. This is a pretty accurate representation of the royalty in The Gingerland.


Doesn't that fit right in? If that old fucker is so worried about his lollipop, can't you see him commanding his entire armies to go after ONE person who has stolen a musical instrument? It would not surprise me if the Magic Lollipop Song also featured in "The Magic Lollipop Adventure" was actually performed by The Glitterhouse, due to similar themes between the two.

Anyway, getting to the crux of the matter: why is the Princess such a bitch? For one thing, she makes absolutely no effort to solve the problem on her own. The first thing she does after her precious glockenspiel is stolen is to complain to King Dad. Hey, why bother trying to find it yourself when you could send out an army of 1,800 people to find the person who stole it?

And about that: she's going off the word of a sparrow, of all animals. "I'm sure it was the harlequin," cries the sparrow in a valiant attempt to be helpful. No questions asked by the royalty, the sparrow is the bird to trust here. If he's so smart, why doesn't he have a position in office?? I'll bet you didn't think of that, Lollipop King! My point is, though, that if the Princess hadn't complained about one possession of hers being taken, then an entire war wouldn't have had to be fought over it.

Lives were surrendered. Blood was spilt. Time was wasted. And the dumb ass Princess was the cause of it all.

5. Cecilia, "Cecilia" (Simon & Garfunkel)


This one gets a bit more surreal than the others. Not quite Magic Lollipop levels of bizarreness, but still enough to consider the sanity of the songwriter. This entire song is about one particular event involving Cecilia and the narrator. The narrator is enjoying a bit of hanky-panky with Cecilia in his bedroom, when (presumably after being "finished") he gets up to watch his face. Oh no! Narrator has been replaced in the sack by someone else.

Moving beyond the inherent evil of the act of cheating, consider exactly how well-planned this cheating is. Yes, Cecilia has somehow come up with another guy - out of thin air - within the timeframe of Mr. Narrator getting up, washing his face, then returning. That's maybe a minute overall. Where is Cecilia getting this other man from??

Worse yet, the narrator explicitly states that it's his bedroom. So not only is he being cheated on in his own room, some guy has apparently been hiding out for the extremely convenient interruption of him going to wash his face. My best guess is that Other Guy was hiding in the narrator's closet, or perhaps under his bed. Cecilia should know better than to fuck some guy who goes around hiding in those sorts of places. He probably smells like mothballs and dust anyway.

The good news is that Cecilia loves the narrator again! Yay! He then falls on the floor laughing, presumably out of happiness that there will be no more strange men popping out of his closet and doing the No-Pants Dance with his woman. I'd probably do the same, but installing a few security cameras around the bedroom isn't a terrible idea either.

"I know someday, I'll be the only one"-Milo Aukerman, "Hope".

Punk rock is not something one would relate to the classic band The Beach Boys, however, The Descendents are a special case. Formed in 1977 and from Manhattan Island, California, the band was not only a hit with punk rock enthusiasts, but had songs vastly different from most punk rock we know. Their music was about women, food, growing up, coffee and all the troubles 19 year olds could face growing up. It was (and still is) relevant to any punk rock youth with songs like "Hope" (about feeling like garbage after a breakup), "I'm Not A Loser" (about being mad at the majority of youth and their decisions) and 'Merican (about learning the sad truth about your country but also embracing the good). The songs could range from caffeinated and angry (I'm Not A Loser) to almost sad and sorrowful (Alive). They manage to cover such a broad range of emotion while breaking the mold from usual punk writings which were usually political.

Speaking of breaking the mold, to examine The Descendents, we must examine their frontman, Milo Aukerman. Milo was never a very punk person, often wearing glasses, khakis and a t-shirt, became a scientist but still plays with the band. He disregarded self-image and instead relied on his personality and amazing talent to carry him. He was a nerd and could be seen very un-punk, but by casting away any image, be it self imposed or as he was seen by fans, he became a mold breaker and one of the biggest punk rock icons you could name, even though he makes dad jokes and is a huge nerd.

The Descendents music is shallow, yes, but provides insight and lessons. For example, Milo Goes to College (their first and one of their most popular albums) does it right in the title. Their lead singer, Milo, went to college, became a scientist but was still able to sing and entertain. This gives us a good lesson about stereotypes, friendship and image, by supporting Milo's decision and efforts, they also decided to create a side band known as All for the hiatus after the album of the same name. This was to preserve the name of The Descendents, as it was Milo's band. Songs like "All-O-Gistics" provide a look at life while being silly, and offering viewpoints based on Aukerman and his band. The music is also very relatable to teenagers and young adults, almost comformitng them by showing them that it's even happened to them too.

So, not only do the Descendents and All give some amazing music, they also provide some alternate viewpoints on life, lessons and even a strange comfort only The Descendents could provide.

"I know someday, I'll be the only one"-Milo Aukerman, "Hope".

Punk rock is not something one would relate to the classic band The Beach Boys, however, The Descendents are a special case. Formed in 1977 and from Manhattan Island, California, the band was not only a hit with punk rock enthusiasts, but had songs vastly different from most punk rock we know. Their music was about women, food, growing up, coffee and all the troubles 19 year olds could face growing up. It was (and still is) relevant to any punk rock youth with songs like "Hope" (about feeling like garbage after a breakup), "I'm Not A Loser" (about being mad at the majority of youth and their decisions) and 'Merican (about learning the sad truth about your country but also embracing the good). The songs could range from caffeinated and angry (I'm Not A Loser) to almost sad and sorrowful (Alive). They manage to cover such a broad range of emotion while breaking the mold from usual punk writings which were usually political.

Speaking of breaking the mold, to examine The Descendents, we must examine their frontman, Milo Aukerman. Milo was never a very punk person, often wearing glasses, khakis and a t-shirt, he became a scientist but still plays with the band. He disregarded self-image and instead relied on his personality and amazing talent to carry him. He was a nerd and could be seen very un-punk, but by casting away any image, be it self imposed or as he was seen by fans, he became a mold breaker and one of the biggest punk rock icons you could name, even though he makes dad jokes and is a huge nerd.

The Descendents music is shallow, yes, but provides insight and lessons. For example, Milo Goes to College (their first and one of their most popular albums) does it right in the title. Their lead singer, Milo, went to college, became a scientist but was still able to sing and entertain. This gives us a good lesson about stereotypes, friendship and image, by supporting Milo's decision and efforts, they also decided to create a side band known as All for the hiatus after the album of the same name. This was to preserve the name of The Descendents, as it was Milo's band. Songs like "All-O-Gistics" provide a look at life while being silly, and offering viewpoints based on Aukerman and his band. The music is also very relatable to teenagers and young adults, almost comforting them by showing them that it's even happened to them too.

So, not only do the Descendents and All give some amazing music, they also provide some alternate viewpoints on life, lessons and even a strange comfort only The Descendents and All could provide.

One problem that the Disney Channel has had over the 2000's was a lack of interesting shows. We got a lot of kid sitcoms like "Sonny with a Chance" and "Cory in the House". Now these shows weren't awful, but they really did feel insanely mediocre in a lot of departments. A lot of them have some of the same character types as the other shows, and they don't even do much interesting with them other than appearance. We did end up getting some pretty decent cartoons like Kim Possible and Dave the Barbarian throughout that time, but Disney still churned out sitcom after sitcom until they wrung the idea bone dry, and caring less about the cartoons.

In 2012, however, we were greeted to a very well written cartoon about a boy and his twin sister searching for mysteries in the show we know as Gravity Falls, inspired by the childhood of the show's creator, Alex Hirsch. Now I know what you're thinking, "Isn't Gravity Falls on Disney XD? Doesn't that kill off what you just said?" Yes, it is on Disney XD, but it still counts as a Disney production. I remember first seeing it around the time it first came out, and I've been following it ever since. Just what is it that Gravity Falls does that makes me and a lot of others go crazy for it? Well, let's start with the premise.

Our story starts off with our two main characters Dipper and Mabel being sent off by their parents to a town in Oregon called Gravity Falls for the summer so they can see their relative, Stan Pines, always referred to by the kids as Grunkle Stan. They live with him in the Mystery Shack, a gift shop and mystery museum with some of the phoniest looking exhibits ever made, but that doesn't stop the gullible tourists from visiting and believing them. In the town itself however, there's some legit weird stuff all around like gnomes that want to make Mabel their Queen, a monster made of "loser candy" that eats kids who reject said "loser candy"on Summerween (Yes, they do celebrate a second Halloween in summer), and overly obsessive dating sims. Along the way of the episodes, Dipper finds books by a mysterious author which obtain the secrets of Gravity Falls itself, and vows to find the author of these books to get some answers about it. However, it appears a lot of the citizens (including Grunkle Stan) have something to hide as well.

It's sort of a blend of Horror, Mystery, and Comedy, and it works really well. There's even some moments where I was wondering how Disney let them get away with some of the stuff they do (How about demonic talking mounted animal heads that drool blood from their mouth? From the happiest place on Earth everybody!). The writing on this show is also amazingly good. Heck, some of the jokes made me laugh harder than I do watching normal adult sitcoms. Another great thing about the writing is how it can really make you guess. For a kids show, it really doesn't push all the clues of later story elements in front of your face, and it's something that you as the viewer will have to figure out for yourself if you want to know what's coming next. It doesn't insult the intelligence of kids while not asking too much of them at the same time, which makes for a very well thought out mystery that even adults can get a kick out of.

It also helps that this series has a large cast of likable characters to go along with it. Dipper is the kid who is the one that is most invested in the mystery itself than anyone else. He is determined to find answers to the various paranormal events that happen, and how to deal with them. We side with him because his determination to the mystery makes him really enjoyable to follow along as a character. On the other side, we have the fan and creator favorite character, Mabel. The best way to describe Mabel is that she is very optimistic and energetic in every situation she is in. She makes a great counterpart Dipper, being that he is very factual with his investigations, and she mostly follows her heart with them. The two of them have great chemistry as twins and it's nice to see a Disney show without siblings that are at each other's throats all the time. They do have bickering sometimes, but it doesn't ever overshadow their overall chemistry. Grunkle Stan is the Uncle of the Pines twins and professional con man. Judging by that last bit of information, you'd probably assume a lot of people would hate this character, but here's the difference between him and other cheapskate types of characters like him. He's actually funny and we also care for him. I really liked how they handled a character that can be so poorly done if you placed your cards wrong, and managed to pull him off as a very likable character.

Jesus Ramirez or "Soos" as everybody calls him, is one of the two workers at the Mystery Shack, and he is a bit on the dumb side, but has a heart of gold and really doesn't have any intentions on harming anybody. Like Grunkle Stan, they handle a character that usually fails in most cases on cartoons, and put some effort into making you want to like them. Even if he's a bit dumb, he's still funny and actually helps with the mysteries with his weird ideas from the little knowledge that he has. The other worker at the Mystery Shack is Wendy, who is a teenager and Dipper's love interest. If I had to think of a least favorite character on this show, she would be a good candidate for it. She's not awful, but she doesn't really contribute much to the plot other than to be Dipper's crush, and nothing else. She isn't my least favorite character though, that spot is reserved for Robbie, Wendy's boyfriend. Again, he's just there for a plot device to be a person for Dipper to be jealous of, and it's even worse with him. Other than that, he's a bit of a jerk towards everyone and there's nothing to really like him for. They do try to redeem him in "The Love God", but the sympathy doesn't really help with redeeming him that much. Luckily he only appears in a few episodes, so he isn't as terrible as he could've been.

The animation is quite decent as well. The team did put some effort into creating this town. The character design also really helps distinguish some of the really funny and memorable minor characters the show has. I think the best part of the animation is the background design. I really love how well done they some of the backgrounds and how they can match the atmosphere of the town, as well as the strangeness and very ominous feel of some of the locations they encounter. One thing that I find hilarious in the show is when they have characters drawn in art styles outside their comfort zone, such as Rumble McSkurmish from "Fight Fighters", Xyler and Craz in "Dreamscapers", and Giffany in "Soos and the Real Girl".

It seems like Disney has out done themselves this time. Gravity Falls is wonderfully written Comedy and Mystery cartoon that will keep you guessing and laughing. The characters for the most part are very well written and likable. The visuals can help create what atmosphere their hearts desire. Now again, it's not perfect. I don't really like Wendy and Robbie as characters and should've stayed out of the plot altogether. Other than those two, I have nothing else to say bad about this show. It's in the middle of it's second season, and I highly recommend that you watch it as soon as possible.

I'll be using this blog mostly to track my progress in Smash and keep notes on what I need to work on and am actually improving on. No idea how often I'll update it but it's for me so whatever.

What to work on

General

• Shield sometimes coming out after a WD. Release the trigger more quickly after one.
• Occassionally standing still or walking after a WD. Work on timing to dash quickly out of a WD.
• STOP DASH DANCING WITHOUT A PURPOSE. Just because it looks cool does not mean you should be always doing it when there are better options.
• Missing wavelands after half the time still, practice them more.
• Missing shieldstun L cancels a lot
• DI generally good but needs a lot of work still.
• Stop forgetting SDI is a thing
• Learn EXACT ranges of ALL attacks so you can stop doing unsafe shit
• Learn OoS options for all characters to apply/escape safe pressure more consistently
• FOLLOW UPS FOLLOW UPS FOLLOW UPS
• Practice ledge options more

Peach (General)

• FC nairs. Not coming out fast enough still.
• STOP PULLING TURNIPS WHEN IT'S UNSAFE. YOU ARE GIVING THEM FREE %.
• Work on being less predictable with FC bairs/fairs
• Work on making transition from reg to claw grip faster when going for FC aerials
• If you FF FC fair their shield, jab ASAP. YOU ARE GOING TO GET GRABBED OTHERWISE.
• Keep practicing movement don't forget Peach is slow as fuck
• Stop dash attacking on shields
• Pay attention to when players CC. Free 60% with Dsmash
• Stop dtilting so much. Why are you doing this it's weird
• DO NOT DJC WITHOUT A REASON. You are using up your DJ and not realizing it until it's too late sometimes.
• Be more aggressive with edgeguards. A lot of chars should be dead as soon as you get them off the stage. Work on Turnip drop-->edgehog and FF Float-->Nair offstage.
• Work on sharking, need to be quicker to get under platforms with float
• Stop playing scared when holding a Stitch. If it misses it misses, your opponent is more afraid of getting hit then you are of missing. Be aggressive with FC aerials.
• Practice bob-omb tech incase you ever pull one in tourney
• Work on turnip throw-->Recatch-->FC nair timing

Peach (Matchup Specific)

vs Fox

• Spaced bairs-->Dsmash seemed good last time
• If Fox is in turnaround back TOWARDS Peach in DD, dash attack or jab.
• Jab-->Upsmash seems to be popular kill option for Fox, watch for it
• Practice chaingrab
• LOOK for situations they CC in, important here
• SDI the upair you fucking retard jesus christ

Need more matchup experience. Find foxes at next local and ask to play them.

vs Falco

• Practice powershielding lasers. Not good enough until you can do it 100% of the time on reaction.
• Fullhop float above laser spam
• Bait shieldgrabs with spaced bair, can follow up with Dsmash
• Watch for dair shine combos and work on DI while in one, giving away too much % on them
• Retreat with fair if he approaches with nair
• DO NOT GIVE HIM STAGE CONTROL you've already seen what a fucking nightmare this MU is when he has all the momentum
• Tech chasing with bair was good last time, work on using nair too
• CHASE HIM OFFSTAGE his recovery is garbage all you need is a nair to end the stock. Remember FF Float-->Nair
• Practice chaingrab
• LOOK for situations they CC in, important here

vs Marth

• PULL A TURNIP WHENEVER POSSIBLE, approach with it
• When turnip is not possible, retreating bairs seem to be best option.
• DO NOT FULLHOP FLOAT YOU WILL GET TIPPER'D
• Avoid being above him, his uptilt and upair are too good
• CC good vs a lot of moves(?) Needs more research
• Edgeguard with turnip drop-->edgehog
• If Marth is turning back TOWARDS Peach in DD, dash attack/FC nair/dash grab are good options
• MARTH'S DTILT WILL ALWAYS POKE YOUR SHIELD
• Marth is stupid and if you play him you're stupid

vs Falcon

• Float camp a lot
• Falcon's upair is ridiculous but came out a lot whenever floating, try to bait them
• DON'T PULL TURNIPS UNLESS FALCON IS FAR AWAY, you got punished 100% of the time for it before
• Get up attack usually ended in getting DJ FF Knee'd. Either don't do it or delay it more
• Take him to FoD when possible, easy Dsmashes
• Space with bair, but remember Falcon's upair beats it

Need more matchup experience, ask to play Falcons at next local

That's it for now. There's a lot of MUs I need more experience in before I'll write about them (wish I had paid more attention back when I was doing netplay with a good Doc and a good Y. Link...internet here is boo boo now unfortunately.)

Will be studying this and possibly adding a few things later if I forgot anything important, but until then, see ya.

I’m not going to mince words for you; yes, a former leader has passed away today at the age of 84. The leader was former Prime Minister Malcolm Fraser, who was sworn in as PM by the Governor-General due to controversial circumstances in 1975, had not been a very effective PM compared to past and recent PMs such as Bob Hawke, Robert Menzies and even John Howard, and was eventually defeated in the year 1983 after almost 8 years of service, where Fraser and his Liberals would be brought down by a record-breaking 24-point swing conducted by eventual Labor PM Bob Hawke. But in the end, Malcolm would at least get the job done right (which included the ‘Turn On the Lights’ slogan when he became the PM, and be the one to introduce an Australian plescibite for a new National Anthem). So, why is he mentioned, and what does he have to do with this episode?

Well, the movie I’m going to talk shares similarities, as it is about two candidates that were gunning for the Presidential role in High School. It would be known that only one could win, due to a controversial hand of interference, though. The film is none other than one of my favourite films: Election. And I found it at the place that always houses videocassettes in Vinnies of Brookvale.

…The VHS Surprises…

While the film was released through Paramount Home Entertainment in 2000, it was originally part of the CIC Home Video company outside of America, and was teamed with Universal Pictures when the company first began in 1982, where it first began as 'Rigby-CIC Video', and would evolve into 'CIC-Taft Video', then 'CIC Video'. The company managed to stay strong and get with the times, right until the turn of the millennium, where it would finally be retired. In the supposed hearings, Universal would get the Spielberg-founded Dreamworks company, whilst Paramount would virtually get everything else from CIC, which includes the blue text, the warning screen, the ‘future video releases’ bumper, the polaroid seal (which did appear on the Election VHS copy I own, by the way), and even the ‘Video Piracy’ warning. Only Roadshow lasted longer in the Home Video industry by five-six years.


Credit goes to FLEMISHDOG for the featured logos. None of them feature any of the CIC logos.

Moving on, the videocassette is encased in a yellow big-box plastic cover, featuring the poster itself. Here in Australia, it is rated MA15+, which is somewhat a fair cop, given the language and personal moments of excitement. It also carries two quotes from critics on the cover:

• “A Nearly Flawless Film. A Sharp and Merciless Comedy” – Kenneth Turan (Los Angeles Times)
• “A winner. Very funny… terrific movie!” – Joe Siegel (Good Morning America)

It also carried two stickers on the outside, but were removed badly, as I can see remnants of where the sticker were and they both were only barely sticky.

As the videocassette is opened, it is in surprisingly good condition; the top and front stickers are intact, the barcode label (Top Video Albion - T10962), the Blockbuster sticker, and – as I pointed out earlier – the CIC polaroid seal. My best theory with this is that CIC was still around by the time Election would be placed on VHS, but were unceremoniously finished and Paramount would subsequently take over and finish the VHS.

The videocassette begins with the traditional CIC warning which is placated on a black/blue background, but seeing that it is a Paramount VHS, it moves either to the movie, or the previews. In this case, it cuts to the previews, which starts with a series of women (such as Audrey Hepburn, Demi Moore, Sally Field, and for some reason, Angelica from Rugrats) which is set to the tune “I Would Do Anything For Love”. The promo is revealed to be ‘Take Home the Woman of Your Dreams’.


Credit goes to philby71 for the promo. As mentioned earlier, the VHS copy I own was released by Paramount, hence it does not feature the CIC logo at the beginning.

The VHS continues as normal, beginning with ‘Future Video Releases’, and we start off with The General’s Daughter (Rated MA, featuring John Travolta and James Woods), which is to be available on video in the month of May. The next segues to The Young Adventures of Indiana Jones (starring the late River Phoenix), which was a collaboration with LucasFilms, and feature a series of collections, such as the High Adventure Years, the Secret Service Years, and the Comic Years. This is, by far, the longest preview on this VHS, beating the ‘Take Home the Woman of Your Dreams’ preview.

The next feature a series of items from MTV; the first being ‘Dead Man on Campus’ (Rated M), the next being ‘Varsity Blues’ (Rated M), then two TV shows from MTV – Beavis and Butthead (Rated M), and Celebrity Deathmatch (Rated PG). I had to talk about the items briefly because all of a sudden, it started flickering before it would stop when it reached TV show previews. It might be a bad omen to watch this while eating an apple, which I unfortunately did when the movie began. And before we see the movie, we get another visit with the ‘Video Piracy’ warning. I already talked about it in Clerks, so let’s move on.


Credit goes to electronman32k for this promo.
And after 16-odd minutes of previews, the movie finally begins, and let me just say that I’ve loved every moment of the film from start to finish. I’ve enjoyed the four main characters – apart from Tracy and Mr. McAllister, there were also the Metzler siblings in Paul (a gullible yet popular figure) and Tammy (a supposedly-closeted lesbian or bisexual) – who each play a key part in the High School election and the way the movie was told through them. I’ve enjoyed every single ounce of the dark humour. I’ve enjoyed Jim McAllister’s (played by ‘Ferris Bueller’ Matthew Broderick) attempts to take down Tracy, and I even enjoyed the apple motifs.

The way the apples are used by the director (who was Alexander Payne) were to imply trouble ahead (especially when Mr McAllister won the ‘Apple Teacher Award’ a record three times at the time), so the only troubles for this VHS were the slight chews in the tape, when Tracy’s accomplishments were about to be introduced, and when then-President Paul celebrates by taking his family out to dinner and seeing Mr McAllister by an off chance. And when the movie ends, the videocassette has nothing more to show.

But when there’s movie about a series of comedic errors that seem endless, how can one blame the VHS ending abruptly when the movie is that good? I sure can’t. And that’s how high I regard this movie. So, if you ever come across a one-word film made by Paramount called ‘Election’, take that chance and rent, or possibly buy, the movie, whether it is on VHS, DVD or any other kind of modern format these days. You’ll won’t regret this movie advice; I promise you.

Final Score
VHS Cover: 8/10 – Featuring the movie poster and the quotes, yet also the two missing stickers, is why it gets an 8.
Videocassette: 10/10 – The perfect videocassette that has everything it needed at the time.
Quality: 8/10 – Apart from slight chews in the Videocassette, no other problems to record.
Warning: 8.5/10 – Maintains the CIC Video warning and the ‘Video Piracy’ warning, which remains informative.
Logo: 5/10 – Given that the movie logo appears when the movie began, it costs the VHS a chance of getting a full score.
Previews/Other Features: 8.5/10 – A total of six previews, and the ‘Take Home the Woman of Your Dreams’ preview is more than enough.
Final Score: 48/60 – Great. To mimic Jim McAllister, ‘that’s a great VHS for you.’

And now, in honour of Malcolm Fraser, I shall close the episode with the current anthem of Australia. Something that the Fraser government has chosen ultimately due to the public in 1977, yet wasn't adopted by Australia until seven years later…


Credit goes to Anthems & Honors Music for the anthem. Farewell, Malcolm. You've done your job when it mattered.

So yeah, today was my 18th birthday. And I'm pleased to say it was a good one. There were parts that didn't go so well but they actually helped in the end. Here's a run-down of what happened.

And of course, to start the day, one must wake up. Which I did, flawlessly, at 6:40. I decided to check YC as I do most mornings, and of course then I saw the aftermath of a certain incident which won't be mentioned here. That got me down a bit, I admit, but in the grand scheme of things it wasn't big. Now awake, I went downstairs and there was quite a few presents for me - I'll save the details but they included some clothes, and a PS4, amongst other things.

Now it was time to get ready for the main activity of the day - we were to head to Scotland, to see some of, the end included, of a rally event. For those not in the know, rallying's a form of autosport (which I love by the way, hence why we went) which, in its professional format, includes driving off-road as quick as you can. Here's a video (not mine), to illustrate:



So yeah, pretty excited for the rally. After a 2 hour drive we arrived at our first stop - the service area, where they work on the cars in between stages of the rally. We went in and saw a few of the cars, including the eventual 2nd-placed car. It was interesting to see how they were worked on. After a short while there, we got something to eat and headed out for the next part of the day - going to see the cars in a special stage. This is the bit in the video above (you know, drive-on-dirt-fast-as-you-can). However, it's at this point things started to go sour.

We had difficulty locating the stage, for one. After several wrong turns and missed signs, we arrived at a rally stage. Unfortunately it was the wrong one, and it had no spectator access. Thus, we were forced to turn around and continue looking. We rejoined the main road, and kept looking - but try as we might, we couldn't find it. By this point I was getting rather frustrated as we'd driven for a while and not found anything, and we thought we were going to be late to seeing the cars take the stage on. Eventually, it got so late that I just couldn't take it anymore and asked to go home. And this is actually where things improved.

You see, my getting upset didn't sit well with my mother, who then proceeded to get annoyed too. Not long after we pulled in to have the food we bought earlier. And it was then, in the back of our van we'd been travelling in, eating my sandwich and looking at the cars (including rally cars, which surprisingly are all road-legal) going by, that it hit me.

I didn't have to ask for any of this. It was all gifted to me.

You see, for the last 18 years my birthdays have been planned way in advance. I've said what I want to happen, and we've gone out and done it. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do this year though. It was actually a surprise finding out 2 days before my birthday we'd be going here; and it was a very nice surprise too. And speaking of surprises: remember how I said I got a PS4? Didn't ask for that either. It was bought for me as a surprise. And again, a very nice one. So yeah, there's me, sitting in the van, having just realised that this whole thing was done out of kindness, for me. I mean, my parents didn't have to bother taking me all the way to Scotland to see a rally. They could have easily not bothered. And they could easily have not bothered getting me a PS4 either. Or saving up £1000 to give to me on my 18th birthday (which they did too).

And it makes me think. All this time, I'm upset over how things hadn't gone how I wanted them to, yet I was lucky to even be here, in Scotland, doing something most people might never get the chance to do. I should be happy I'm where I am.

And suddenly I become happier. The tears of disappointment and frustration changed into tears of happiness, thankfulness and joy. And I think, you know what, let's keep going, let's go and see the end of this thing, see the cars finish. We were going to anyway but now I was happy I was going to get the chance. So off we went, to the town of Jedburgh (which we've been to before). On arriving there we discovered something humorous; that we'd miscalculated our timings and were an hour ahead of what the actual times were! Hence, we arrived in Jedburgh an hour early. We killed some time by going to a nearby coffee shop (my mother didn't go in, nor did she go to see the end) and me and my father went to see the end. After a lengthy half-hour wait, the cars began to file in at about 4:40 and it was nice to see, after the trials and tribulations of the day. We watched a few cars, and at about 5pm we decided it was time to go home. The drive home was long too, and we arrived home at about 7pm. And here I am now, home again.

My mother still doesn't want to talk to me, unsurprisingly. Perhaps I deserve it. But then again, I was lucky to get the chance to see what I saw. I did have a good day in the end. And it's all thanks to the lessons I learnt. I've never had a birthday where I learn anything before. I guess my 18th has been the most important for me, not because of what 18 means as an age, but rather as I now understand all the life lessons I've been taught over the years. I see what I've taken for granted; and that I could just as easily not have any of it. I was lucky to get what I did, and I should be happy I did get it. And I am. Very much so.

Perhaps I can reconcile with my mother tonight; maybe tomorrow. I plan to thank her for going to the bother of organising it all, and perhaps explain to her just how much I appreciate it, how much I appreciate her putting herself out for a son that demands the world from a family that can't give it; and never gives anything back in return - and how much I've learned from this one day that I thought wasn't going well, but in reality was actually one of the best days of my life. Not because it went well; because it didn't. But because it taught me the lesson that I hope that I'll remember, for my own sake.

That lesson: Learn to appreciate every little thing you get to do, as there's so many people out there who won't the chances you do.

And with that, I'm done. Hope I didn't get too philosophical on you all. I just feel different to how I did when I woke up. I almost feel like a new person, writing this blog post. Hopefully I'm a better one.

Throughout the past year, there's been a lot of disenchantment within our camp, just feeling let down by ourselves and everybody around us. I had been having conversations with my younger brother, who is 26. He's a major gamer; he runs [Dungeons & Dragons] at conventions and has been on 4chan since he was 14. So he's talking philosophies, strategies, different decks you use in Magic: The Gathering, and we started talking aboutthe control deck. I'd been reading about parallel things that were totally separate from gaming: the idea of using peoples' powers against them. I mean, it's an insane notion [laughs]: "control decks" in real life. But I've always been very interested in magic-- more psychologically, like magical thinking. - Zach Hill, the drummer for Death Grips in an interview with music journalism outfit Pitchfork, 2012.

Once upon a time, there were three guys who lived in Sacramento, California who decided to create music together. Their names were Stefan Burnett, Zach Hill, and Andy Morin. Stefan was an ex-art college student who liked to paint and worked at a pizza joint. Zach Hill was a fairly well known drummer who had been part of the math rock scene, especially in the band Hella. Andy Morin was also a relatively well known individual whose strengths were in producing and sound engineering. Stefan and Zach were neighbors, and Zach already knew Andy from the music scene. Stefan had been briefly part of the hip-hop scene with his brother, but before Death Grips, not many people knew the name Stefan Burnett, or as he came to be known, MC Ride, the loudmouthed energetic front man who is part of one the most critically acclaimed and well known groups from the underground music scene. Death Grips combined hip-hop with erratic beats, cryptic lyricism, and abrasive energy. Along with the very reserved and secretive attitude of the band's members, Death Grips were as much a mystery as they were notorious. Hiding in plain sight, people were drawn to the way Death Grips were innovating with the idea of genre, and the aura that surrounded them. This blog post really isn't about the genesis of Death Grips, but rather, how they managed to spend nearly a year generating interest and leading on an entire music community to the release what was said to be their final album, The Powers That B.To get a better grasp on how Death Grips managed to pull this off, we need to start with their biggest career stunt to date. It all starts when they signed onto Epic Records shortly before the release of their first album of 2012, The Money Store.

PROLOGUE: NO LOVE

The first time Death Grips ever cancelled tour dates, it was very shortly after they began. After finally scoring a record deal with Epic due to the underground success of their first mixtape, Exmilitary, which was released in 2011, Death Grips released The Money Store to critical acclaim. Music journalism hailed it as revolutionary, and the album broke Death Grips into more notoriety above the surface with songs like "I've Seen Footage" and "Blackjack". Not long after this album was released, Death Grips then announced there would be a second album in 2012. For many bands, it was incredibly rare to have two albums in one year unless it was a double album or related to that format. It was also well known that Death Grips was going on tour during the summer, so the idea that they'd be able to make time to create a completely new second album was a mystery to the fans, and to their label. With all this coming up for the Death Grips, people were not sure what was going to happen next. In fact, nobody really had a grasp on the enigma that was Death Grips. It had started to disappear in bits and pieces through interviews, but for the most part, it was just Zach Hill talking, and most already knew that name. Stefan and Andy commonly remained silent and people heard very little from them. With all the talk of a second album amongst all these obligations, how would Death Grips make time?

They cancelled their tour.

Epic was angry. Fans were too. Death Grips sacrificed their entire tour to make their second album of 2012 a reality. This was the first sign that Death Grips wasn't just another band. Very few on a label would take this risk, and it was not hard to tell that the people that made up Death Grips were not afraid to take risks for their music. Even in anger, people were intrigued. They wanted to see how this album would turn out. For a long time, the name of the album was rumored to be "NO LOVE". During the latter half of 2012, an alternative reality game started to form. Death Grips used the 4chan board /mu/ and the deep web to convey this message, through images with encrypted files and deep web pages that were embedded with ciphers and codes of all sorts. For months, users cracked locked files and puzzles to gain further insight into what Death Grips was going to do with their new album. It's important to mention that this ARG set up Death Grips as the kind of band who used cryptic methods with their fans to garner interest and to keep up the mystery. At the end of it all, people discovered that the new album's full title would be NO LOVE DEEP WEB. Not only that, but the album was coming out on October 1st, 2012. It's important to also mention that there was one last file in the ARG that nobody was able to open, and to this day remains a mystery.

One more thing: Epic refused to let Death Grips release it in October. So instead, Death Grips released it themselves.

For all the months they were recording, Death Grips wasted the label's money at the Chateau Marmont in Los Angeles, California. They stayed there and had a grand time, recorded a large amount of footage which ended up being used in promotional videos for Adult Swim and the video for "Come Up and Get Me", the album's first song. This is also the legendary hotel in which a particular bathroom, Zach Hill wrote NO LOVE DEEP WEB on his penis, took a picture on it, and decided to make it the album cover. Yes, NO LOVE DEEP WEB was more than just an album, but also the legacy of how it was created, and what Death Grips were willing to do to get their music released. After their self-release stunt, Epic very briefly and quickly cut ties with them. The reaction to this was wild, and Death Grips was applauded. This was the stunt of a band who wasn't afraid of anything, not even consequences, as long as it meant their music was being released out into the world. Death Grips knew how to use the forces to their will. This was the first example. It wouldn't be until 2014 that they would decide to do this again, but even more cryptically, and for an even longer period of time.

It would work, too.

PART 1: "WE ARE NOW AT OUR BEST AND SO DEATH GRIPS IS OVER."

Fast forward. It's 2014. In late 2013, Death Grips released Government Plates to a polarized reaction. Instead of Death Grips' conventional abrasive energy, their sound had turned into something more electronically influenced and erratic. MC Ride had very little presence on the latter half of the album and the entire album was uploaded to Youtube in a series of strange videos, most of which were made in Blender, with two of them being recorded footage. One had MC Ride having a very adverse reaction to something as the first song on the album played, and the second was Zach Hill (in a skeleton mask with a hat on) and Andy Morin with a flashlight going through a park at night as the last song of the album plays. This album confused many people, but some wished to embrace this new chapter of Death Grips. After parting with Epic, Death Grips rarely did interviews. In fact, they were even more reserved and private after their record deal than before. In the time that had passed, Death Grips were able to make a special deal with Harvest Records to run off of their own branch of the label known as Third Worlds. With this, Death Grips had a lot more control over their material.

Early 2014, people are wondering if even more new material is coming. thirdworlds.net, the Death Grips official website goes down for an extended amount of time. Suddenly, talk of the Blood Moon ARG comes into play. It's important to note here that Death Grips has a fixation with constellations and the alignment of the moon and planets, especially Andy, whose studio pictures commonly have pictures of planets in them. This is the entire basis for the ARG in question. For the most part, people believed Death Grips were going back to the ARG format to convey details for another new album coming in 2014. It wasn't rare of them to release music so close to each other in succession. The funny thing is that they weren't wrong. The other funny thing is that the ARG was fake, propagated by German rap duo Tim & Shim to promote their new album and as a ruse to the Death Grips fans. Needless to say, people weren't entirely happy about this, but by the time this fake ARG panned out, it turned out new music wasn't that far away.

June 8, 2014. Out of the blue, completely unannounced, Death Grips release a download link for Niggas on the Moon, the first part of their newly announced double album, The Powers That B. People go wild. This is new material that hadn't been talked about a single time since the release of Government Plates. This new material ends up being even more polarizing than the last. Ride's lyrics are cryptic to the point of being esoteric. His flow is sometimes fast and incredible and other times slow and brooding. On top of that all, the beats are insane, and Zach's playing V-drums to trigger samples of Björk. Yes, turns out the Icelandic singer/songwriter and Death Grips are good friends. This won't be the first time that Death Grips turn out to have interesting acquaintances. People are very interested now. If this is the first part of an album, where's the second part? People knew nothing about it, and Death Grips were about to go on tour with Soundgarden and Nine Inch Nails! This was Death Grips hitting the big leagues of touring. Another summer tour and how were they planning to work out this second disc of their proposed double album?

They cancelled the tour again. Actually, they broke up.

They posted a breakup note on Facebook, and then people went wild. It's July 2014, and I'm going to the NIN tour myself, and The Dillinger Escape Plan is there instead of Death Grips. Trent Reznor apologizes on Twitter, and everyone's confused. "We are now at our best," they say. People weren't sure how to take the sudden breakup. Many thought there was no way they were broken up, and that they were doing this to get out of the tour for some reason. Others believed this was the last of Death Grips and they wanted to go out on a high note. In any case, the fanbase was in turmoil, and they didn't even know where the rest of the album was. However, in the aforementioned breakup note, before the notorious "stay legend" line, Death Grips name dropped the second disc to their unfinished double album.

It was called Jenny Death.

PART 2: JENNY DEATH WHEN?

This is MC Ride's face from the famous "You Might Think He Loves You For Your Money But I Know What He Really Loves You For It's Your Brand New Leopard Skin Pillbox Hat" music video for the album Government Plates. For the entire song, Stefan's face is about this close to the camera. His expressions are about this vibrant. It's not quite clear if he's on any substances or if he's just going hard in front of the camera. Regardless, this image is less about the video it's from, but more about what it represents. Starting from the breakup note, this face would be the figurehead of all Death Grips discussion in the following months. It would be this very image, this very face, this very smile, with three very simple words amounting to what is a very simple question.

"jenny death when"

At this point, all people knew were one half of the album, and the names of both the second half and the entire double album. At this point, there was only album artwork and track listing for the first half, which had already been released. Up until October, this question would have no good answer. People were starting to resort to theories, going back to planetary movement and the moon to gauge a date for the album. People knew so little that they only had names to go on, but they wanted to know. Death Grips breaking up had just made people more interested in the album's entire release, and so, "jenny death when" threads and discussion were incredibly common, and not entirely productive. As the summer ended with complete radio silence from the band (or conceptual art project, as they had self-proclaimed), people were grasping at straws. Many people were convinced that a certain date in October coinciding with planetary retrograde would shed some light on the mystery of the second half's release.

Coincidence or intuition? In an ironic fashion, this is the only time the community's long reaching guesses would ever hold any weight. On October 10th, 2014, an update to Third Worlds came out of nowhere. Finally, after months of wait, the band finally released the covers of both Jenny Death and The Powers That B as a whole. The former was a neon depiction of Marilyn Monroe (who's original name is Norma Jeane Mortenson, the "Jeane Morte" presumably being where Jenny Death's name comes from) and the latter was a picture of a ground light from the "I've Seen Footage" music video with the Death Grips name scratched into it. Later it would be found that this was taken at the London Heathrow Airport. The back of the double album contained a picture of MC Ride from the even older "Guillotine" music video with the "ath" letters missing from the Death Grips name. Many tried to gain insight into this, thinking it was a hint towards the future of the album's release. This page would stay pretty much the same until the album's inevitable release, with the same ominous text branding the top of the page.

"Our new double album "The Powers That B" is now complete. Digital and physical release dates coming soon."

PART 3: INANIMATE SENSATION

December 9th, 2014. It's been a couple months, and the theories are still floating around. One of the big ones seems to almost be right on the mark, but not quite. In the song "Up My Sleeves", which opened the first half of the elusive double album, Stefan revealed a personal detail about himself that people thought was the key to the album's release. As ridiculous and unreliable as these theories were, the line "My dead mother in my dreams/Remember when December blew her ashes 'cross my jeans" pointed people towards December as the second half's release. After all, Death Grips had claimed it would be released "later this year". How much later could they release it than December? Well, it wasn't the album that Death Grips got in early December, but the very first taste of it. Behold, "Inanimate Sensation", the first single from Jenny Death. Once again dropped without any word, this song caused a huge commotion. It seemed as if the second half of The Powers That B would be a lot different than the first. Where Niggas on the Moon was esoteric, frantic, and sometimes incomprehensible, this song was a lot more of the vein of early Death Grips, combining abrasive lyricism with heavy production. Zach's drums were also far more prominent in this track, and it was easy to see that this wasn't just a song that hearkened back to their early material, but also going somewhere even greater.

This video was also the comeback of the living, breathing, MC Ride. His face had not been seen much since Government Plates, but now he was back in full form with hair, a hat, and giant googly eyes. Yes, this was an interesting sample of their new music, and where people were hitting walls with theories and baseless assumptions, Death Grips has extended their hands once again. Hype for the album came back in full force, and December came as the month where many were convinced the album would be released by the end of the month. People picked apart this video to look for hints towards the future of Death Grips. There was a lot for fans to contemplate, and they waited eagerly through the Christmas season to see if Death Grips would deliver.

They did not.

In fact, Inanimate Sensation was all fans would get for quite a bit. Many felt betrayed (though they weren't technically promised a release by the end of 2014) that Death Grips didn't live up to their "end of the year" release stated by the breakup note. They had broken all the rules just to get NO LOVE DEEP WEB out by the release date. What had changed? What fans didn't realize is that Death Grips were changing up the rules again under their nose. What would come as 2015 rolled into being was a frenzy of speculation and theorizing that was unparalleled with the hype it was producing. By simply releasing one song without any more information, Death Grips had gotten the community talking again, and people were begging for more.

There would be many discoveries, real and fake. In the midst of it all, Death Grips discussion dominated inside the Death Grips communities and spreading onto indie music boards. People continued to spread across the "jenny death when" message, people wanting more and more to know when the album was coming. This was the beginning of a craze.

PART 4: THEORY CRAZE - @bbpoltergiest, RETROGRADE, GRAVEYARDS, FAKE ARGS, SPECULATED RELEASE DATES, AND MORE

Let's back up a little bit before "Inanimate Sensation". In November, the vinyl record service Record Store Day had a RSD event, and the prize was an incredibly limited 900 pressing release of Government Plates on vinyl. Many were unable to get this copy before the scalpers would, but with a choice few getting it who were real fans, there were pictures. One thing learned is that Robert Pattinson (yes, the guy from Twilight) played guitar on the track "Birds", and was apparently good friends with Stefan, as seen in a paparazzi video chasing Robert around before a Beyoncé with MC Ride himself there. The other thing is that the license plate replica that came with the vinyl copy had a code on it, which had what seemed to be a timestamp on it for 12/24. Christmas Eve. People believed that this sudden release had the key to the release of their new album, but as I mentioned before, Death Grips did not deliver on Christmas Eve. They did not say anything during the month of December following Inanimate Sensation.

In the time that follows, people figured out a key fact in the sea of assumptions that turned out to be true. The twitter, @bbpoltergiest, which many believed was fake, turned out to have some credibility. With Death Grips being notorious for making new Twitter accounts, both their previous Twitter accounts, @deathgripz and @bbpoltergeist (ei, instead of ie) had been taken over by fans. @bbpoltergiest, however, was a mystery which turned out to be of interest when people noticed that in August, months before Inanimate Sensation was released, there was a picture of the basketball court in Blender posted on the Twitter account. This basketball court was the exact same shown in the background of the Inanimate Sensation music video. Along with pictures of previous tour items and emails from the Death Grips email account, people decided that this Twitter must be real, or very convincing. Up until the album's release, this Twitter would be monitored all the time. Death Grips, full well noticing this, took advantage of the situation, sometimes retweeting posts about themselves in mass amounts to set people off. This was a key point of interest. This very twitter claimed things like "we're going on tour" and "everyone thinks we broke up but we didn't.", making people wonder if their speculation about Death Grips using their breakup as a stunt turned out to be the truth.

As December was coming to a close, people were grasping. People monitored planetary motion and phases of the moon. Fans were desperately trying to find a date of significance that would make sense for the album to be released, if it lied in the stars or if it lied in the Death Grips history. Nobody could say for sure, but the hype was building to colossal size. Many thought that locating the place on the Jenny Death cover would shed some light on the album's release. Others believed that finding out who "Jenny" was would lead to some conclusion as to when the album would come out. There were many theories that it had nothing to do with Marilyn Monroe, but the death of "Jenny" somewhere in Sacramento, where Death Grips were from. Many figured that if they could find the cemetery on the cover of Niggas on the Moon, they would discover something. An image started to revolve around about "Baby Jenny" buried in a Sacramento cemetery. Many believed this was the aforementioned location, but there were differences that gave many doubts. These theories did not pan out.

In between all that, there were many fake alternate reality games being created to fool people. Many who were still familiar with the NLDW ARG believed that some of these could be real, but they never were. One ended with the entirety of a Childish Gambino skit inside of a locked .zip file. Others just ended with plain images that made it clear that none of these were real, and that the reality of the situation was that until Death Grips themselves said anything, there would be nothing to learn. It was a long month for Death Grips fans, and many went into 2015 very disappointed.

Then thirdworlds.net went down.

PART 5: FASHION WEEK

Once upon a time (again), Zach Hill mentioned that he was directing a movie, speculated to be called The Sickest Fuck Of Them All. Death Grips as a whole confirmed they would be doing the soundtrack for this movie, and then news of this disappeared. Whether or not Fashion Week, an instrumental soundtrack released on January 4th, 2015, had anything to do with this is uncertain. Here are the facts. Out of nowhere, Death Grips drops an instrumental album with no MC Ride in it. Fourteen tracks, completely nothing to signal that this was coming, and once again the Death Grips had sent the fans into a frenzy. Many were not sure what to think at first, but it was even more interesting when people realized a few things. First: Sua Yoo, the artist who created the artwork for The Money Store is sitting in that chair. Second, this chair is located in the Silver Legacy Casino in Reno, Nevada. Third, and maybe even the most important, each track starts with "Runway" and then is followed by a letter. People didn't understand the significance of this until they imported the album into their music players, and saw the track list in full.

All the track letters spelled out: JENNYDEATHWHEN. Yes, "jenny death when".

Once again, people were at a loss. However, as interested as ever, fans got to work. Many believed that the title of this abruptly released album had something to do with the upcoming fashion weeks happening in Sacramento and in the California area. Around this time, sites like Amazon and cduniverse started jotting down the double album's release as being February 10th, 2015, which was around when the Sacramento fashion week began. The coincidence between these two events got people guessing that this would be the real release date, and that things were coming to a close. Death Grips started to increase in activity as well, releasing new merchandise that had people wondering if this was finally the end of this long wait.

In the wake of this, many were creating fake track lists for Jenny Death, which was just harmless fun. However, the interesting part of this was the timing. Not too long after this started to catch on, a website page on HMV Japan showed the tracklists for both sides of the album. Many people believed that somehow this was a fake tracklist that somehow go onto the info of the website, considering the track "Have a Sad Cum" was listed incorrectly as "Have a Sad Cum BB" and that the track names like "On GP" (which many thought meant On Government Plates, which in retrospection is kind of silly) and "Death Grips 2.0" were just fabricated and that there was no concrete proof that this listing could be concrete.

Now it's February 13th, right before Valentine's Day, and there's still no album. The fashion week theories are starting to fall apart. People were losing hope until all of a sudden, the Death Grips YouTube channel was active once again, and this time, the insight was even more interesting than before.

PART 6: THE REHEARSAL VIDEO, THE PHANTOM LISTINGS, @bbpoltergiest DEATH AND REBIRTH, AND THE FINAL THEORIES

So this rehearsal video drops, and people are wondering a few things. First off, the entire video is blue and you can make out Zach Hill drumming and Stefan in the distance rapping, presumably in front of a mirror or a door. The second thing is that it's almost impossible to distinguish much from the audio due to its mass distortion. Through context, people figured out that a few minutes in, they start playing "Inanimate Sensation". At the very end of the video where it cuts off, they're playing "Lock Your Doors" from NO LOVE DEEP WEB. Then people started to realize that all the material in between doesn't sound like anything they've done before. It's then and there that people realized this was a rehearsal video playing songs from Jenny Death. The first song playing was speculated to be the first track in the discovered track listing, "I Break Mirrors With My Face In The United States", because people could make out Stefan yelling "I BREAK MIRRORS WITH MY FACE IN THE UNITED FACE" at the beginning. The unidentified tracks playing for the rest of the video were speculated to be "Turned Off" and "Why a Bitch Gotta Lie" which were also from the track list. This was the confirmation people needed to believe that the track list was real.

With "Lock Your Doors" in the video, people also believed that they were rehearsing for a tour.

For the rest of February, a considerable amount of "phantom listings" were coming up on sites like Ebay and Amazon. The album would be put on a listing for sale and then would be removed or altered considerably. Many record releases on Ebay were by foreign sellers (especially Japanese sellers) and would commonly be pulled from listing or refunded. Many people could not figure out if the listings had any concrete product to them, but it was thought that this was a sign that copies of the album were finally being put into physical form.

At the same time, the new release date that was being speculated was "March 31st, 2015". However, near the end of February, the release date on Amazon changed from April 2015, and then to some date in 2020, signifying that the listing had no concrete information attached to it. People were unsure if the March release date was going to be real or not. At this point, there was still not enough to go on for people to be able to believe fully in the release of the album being this close.

In the midst of this, @bbpoltergiest closed after a long night of retweeting "I hate Death Grips" tweets. Many believed that this was a sign, but they didn't know what of. A week or so later, the account reopened before someone could claim it, and the Twitter tweeted images from the "Loser" music video by Beck. Nobody could understand what this meant until they realized that the date of the music video's upload was March 8th. On March 8th, 2011, Death Grips officially released their first song, "Full Moon (Death Classic)" to the world. The final theory that people had was that the album would come on this date to celebrate the history of Death Grips. This was a well founded theory, but before the date could come to confirm it, @bbpoltergiest finally broke its silence once again to drop the information that would finally signify an end to the long wait fans had been going through for the release of what was said to be the final release in Death Grips history. However, in the very same post, Death Grips basically confirmed one more thing.

They were really going on tour. Death Grips were alive again.

PART 7: THE FINAL STRETCH: SNIPPETS, WAITING ROOM RECORDS, ON GP, A RELEASE DATE, AND THE LEAK THAT BROUGHT JENNY ONCE AND FOR ALL

It's a few days before this tweet comes into existence, and on the website bol.com, the track list comes up again, but something is completely different. This track list has PREVIEW snippets. That's right, the songs finally have a preview, and it confirms a few things. The track list is real, the album is close, and that this album was going to be something different. In tracks like "Beyond Alive" and "Centuries of Damn", a guitar was very clearly present in the songs. Many believed that this was Nick Reinhart from Sacramento rock band Tera Melos, who Zach Hill was good friends with, and whose twitter was filled with cryptic references to Death Grips. Some also believed Robert Pattinson might have some part in this, considering his surprise contribution on Government Plates.

Then this tweet happens, and people are not sure what to think. Finally, dates are starting to be dropped. People have very little doubt of @bbpoltergiest's legitimacy, and people decide to ditch the March 8th theory instead to wait for March 17th.

They don't have to wait that long. On March 12th, "On GP" drops. This is the first full song drop since Inanimate Sensation back in December, and with the snippets out in the wild, people were starting to finally believe that the album was finally getting released. The very next day, Death Grips release what is called a "official video" for On GP featuring the physical vinyl copy of The Powers that B and a well known Sacramento magician, Russell Brown. It seems that they had lost the right to use the original Marilyn Monroe image for the album cover, but people are still hyped. March 17th comes, and @bbpoltergiest rings true. Days before, Harvest Records had accidentally put the album up for preorder. After taking it down abruptly, Death Grips officially announced the release date of their album, March 31st, 2015, with the release of the title track, "The Powers that B".

Now it's March 18th. Illinois based Waiting Room Records announces a listening booth and provides a picture for the physical release of the album. People who live in the area go down to see if it's a physical release for purchase. Turns out it's not, but a few manage to record a bit of the listening booth tracks before leaving. The album is so close that people almost can't stand the wait. Many wish that they could have gone home with the physical CD to release it for the world, but they were unsuccessful. People go to bed disappointed, but still excited now that the album was in arm's reach.

The very next day, on March 19th, 2015, Jenny Death leaks. Lyrics for the album were scanned as well as the credits, confirming Zach's v-drums on the first half of the album and Nick Reinhart's contribution to the album, as well as Zach Hill's high school friend Julian Imsdahl playing organ and guitar on some other tracks. Finally, after almost a year long wait, the album is finally here. Death Grips, realizing this, decide to stream the entire album on their own channel out of good faith. For an album many were claiming "would never come out" it almost seemed unreal that it was finally here to listen to.

Thus ends the tale of "jenny death when".

EPILOGUE: THE POWERS THAT B

It is now March 26th, 2015. I'm writing this and the album has been the hands of music listeners for a week. Death Grips did confirm a tour on the 24th, and tickets are going on sale on the 27th. This album is critically acclaimed and has been a huge focus in music discussion along with Kendrick Lamar's To Pimp a Butterfly. The most interesting part of this whole thing is how Death Grips captivated an entire community of fans and music listeners and kept them guessing, wanting, theorizing, proclaiming, and creating for almost an entire year just for the release of one album, and not even that. Just the second disc of one album. They wanted the completion of what was thought to be the final album in the Death Grips legacy. With this tour and some subtle comments from the group themselves, it seems that this might not be the end of Death Grips at all. Should they be criticized for faking a breakup and ditching a tour for the sake of music? Maybe, but whether you despise them or admire them, the fact that they managed to keep this up for months and months on end is incredible. As a fan of this band, the music is all the more amazing knowing what they've gone through to build up the excitement for all of this.

Death Grips is not only innovating music, but they're innovating communication from band to fan, and they're innovating the way an album is promoted. Considering I was here for about every part of this journey, I have to say that it was an interesting experience. Zach Hill's talk of the "control deck" was brought up near the end, and it makes so much sense. Death Grips had to know what fans were doing and theorizing, and they used those forces against them to keep them guessing. They were completely successful, and it gave all fans an experience to resonate with the entire album.

So where are Death Grips going next? Who knows, and it's hard to theorize. The group is as mysterious as they've ever been, and as they go into their tour and into the future, if we've learned anything from this experience, it's that you can never predict what they're going to do next. Chances are they're already one step ahead.

"Stay legend."

Hello people, This is me, Aygo, A.K.A. AygoMedia, AygoTheClownIsBack, AygoMedia1997, Aygo Abstract, ilvamaster, Whatever you want to call me.

Yesterday, I was at a Chewiki article about me, but then, I saw something weird.
There was a picture of Mario's face instead of my Aygo the Clown icon on my Profile box.
I know that some people are afraid of clowns, and that's understandable.

I don't know if it's an edit, or a glitch, but hey, I'll take it.
Let me know if it's an edit or a glitch.

Chewiki article about me here: http://youchew.net/wiki/index.php?title=AygoMedia

OK, see ya, people.

A long argument has been debated on who is the best James Bond, with a total of six candidates. With Australian actor George Lazenby, and that actor from Hawks named Timothy Dalton each appearing in less than three movies, that rules the two out, while Pierce Brosnan is also scratched out by appearing in only one good James Bond movie out of four in Goldeneye. And while Daniel Craig is posing as a strong contender for the best James Bond… he doesn’t have any Bond movies on Videocassette, so you now may know where this is going. Hell, even Celebrity Deathmatch beat me to the punch with the idea almost 16 years ago. It’s Sean Connery vs Roger Moore to settle the Battle of the Bonds in the VHS war!

…The VHS Surprises…

To fight the fight for Sean Connery (and to be fair, I’m only focusing on the official Bond films), we have arguably the weakest film that he made as James Bond, being Diamonds are Forever, with the VHS being made coincidentally in 1983. Fighting on Roger Moore’s side is certainly not one of his best works as Bond, in The Man with the Golden Gun, with the VHS made a year earlier in 1982, thus making it one of the oldest videocassettes I’ve owned by default (along with the Heaven Can Wait VHS from Rigby-CIC Video). And already they have something in common: both of them are rental Videocassettes released by Warner Home Video. The reason why is because a deal was made betwixt the two companies, whilst MGM… was yet to get their movies out another way until 1983, through PBV at the time.



Both of the Videocassettes are similar to each to each other, yet the two copies I own are both rental Videocassettes, unlike the two shown above.

The similarities with both VHS’s are identical; both of them were packaged in clamshells (a popular packaging feature back in the early 80’s) made by Warner Home Video, and both of them showcase the movie’s poster, part of the plot which appears to be summed up by a paragraph, and the main cast. I can tell you that Diamonds are already pulling ahead, because it features 12 cast members, whilst Golden Gun only shows a quarter of that! Must’ve been an early era for the latter VHS…

The stickers differ as well; Both of them carry the mandatory Warner Home Video polarised seal, and also the ’20 cents’ sticker (which is the cost of every videocassette I can nab by the way), both have different stickers. Diamonds carries a somewhat torn brown square sticker on the spine, a number 4 sticker, a ‘Strictly 1 Day Hire Only’ sticker (which is ruined at a corner, and it even carries a square ‘M’ rated sticker (which was one of the early ways to tell what rating the VHS was, even though it could complicate things as well in some cases). Golden Gun, on the other hand carries a square sticker with the letter ‘D’ in blue ink and the number ‘68’ on the front and spine respectively, while as it is opened, it also carries a white rectangular sticker, presumably indicating how many times it was rented and/or played, totalling four times when I bought it.

And with the Videocassettes, it’s the same story; completely black Scotch VHS tapes made in the U.S.A, both carrying the same top and front stickers (with Golden Gun looking slightly superior), both carry the polarised seal, and they also carry the similar stickers on the cover, such as the letter sticker (in Diamonds’ case, it is ‘E’) and the number sticker. On the one hand, the Diamonds are Forever Videocassette stickers looks to have weather the test of time, with both major stickers looking dirty, whilst The Man with the Golden Gun’s polarised seal is on the other way around. At this point, it truly is a neck-and-neck game, but will this change when they’re both put in?


Credit goes to Logo Archive for the upload of this rare warning. I'm assuming that it ended before 1984 began, since a WHV/UA Videocassette (Trail of the Pink Panther) of that mentioned year never had that.

Well, when they’re put in, it’s the same story, but a completely different thing that I have seen. Both videocassettes feature a rather ware Warner Home Video/United Artists warning, probably only seen on a couple of Videocassettes at the time. Diamonds starts with the warning right off the bat, whilst Golden Gun takes 30-40 seconds, but they both start and finish the same way. And they also carried the plastered United Artists logo of 1982 at the time, and would immediately run with the feature presentation.

Speaking of the feature presentation, both videocassettes, surprisingly, have above average quality: clear visuals and sounds, no signs of flickering, and were amazingly well-treated (despite the fact that both videocassettes were rentals, and are over 30 years of age. Out of the two films, however, the one that I would want to see more commonly would have to be Diamonds are Forever. The reason why is because Sean Connery, despite showing signs of aging in his early 40s, still puts on a show and gives a consistent performance, yet Golden Gun, on the other hand, has more unusual moments, including Tattoo portraying the Villain’s henchman (played by Christopher Lee, famous for his roles of Dracula, Lord Summerisle, and Scaramanga himself). The barrel stunt, however, I have no complaints with it, especially when there’s Sherriff J.W. Pepper and the slide whistle involved.

By the time both videocassettes finished the movie (yes, I’ve been watching until the very end of many videocassettes to see if there are hidden easter eggs or surprises), Diamonds cut to black almost immediately, whilst Golden Gun showcased another warning screen from Warner Home Video, showcased on a blue screen with orange text. Apparently, this was a warning for rental videocassettes, yet since it didn’t appear on Diamonds, I would assume that it was only before 1983.


Credit goes to Dan Openings for the Rental Warning. However, this Warning only appeared at the end of The Man with the Golden Gun, and did not have the 'Warner Home Video' logo nor the '1982 United Artists' logo attached.

And now it comes down to the final part to settle this duel; the ejection. Diamonds managed to escape with ease, yet Golden Gun ultimately falters, due to an unreliable spring in the Videocassette (which has been a relatively rare feature I have found with some old and somewhat modern Videocassettes), thus helping me decide a winner in the truly neck-and-neck race. And so, going by this VHS war, Sean Connery triumphs over Roger Moore in the Battle of the Bonds!

But in the end, both of them actually do hold their own, and they both excel in their own way. Connery succeeds in portraying a serious Bond in the most part, and has taken down the villain in some unique ways, yet Moore has literally travelled around the world by Moonraker, and even was the one Bond who defeated Blofeld for good in For Your Eyes Only. He also has the ability to kill with his foot, yet Connery could punch a villain to his eventual death. Both of them played Bond an unprecedented seven times, with Moore being the oldest to portray Bond at the age of 57, while Connery first reached that mark (unofficially) with Never Say Never. With the two, it’s literally hard to pull the two apart.

But maybe it’ll turn into a three-horse race someday, when Daniel Craig gets his golden watch after his finishes his contract and role as James Bond. And when that day comes, it’ll be torture trying to pick the best Bond out of the three.

Final Score
VHS Cover: 8/10 (Diamonds), 7.5/10 (Golden Gun) – Both are truly hard to tear apart if you remove the stickers, yet Diamonds just squeaks by with a larger cast that is quadrupled compared to what Golden Gun has.
Videocassette: 8.5/10 (Diamonds), 8/10 (Golden Gun) – Both have the similar stickers, yet Golden Gun is the cleaner of the two. However, that is sacrificed due to the failure to eject, unlike Diamonds.
Quality: 9/10 (Both) – For over 30 years, both Videocassettes have amazing quality. I’m really lucky to have both of the Rental Videocassettes in good quality!
Warning: 7.5/10 (Diamonds), 8/10 (Golden Gun) – Both of them feature the rare Warner Home Video/United Artists warning, yet Golden Gun has the added ‘Rental Warning’ at the very end of the VHS.
Logo: 6/10 (Both) – The still Warner Home Video logo is uninspiring, and the 1982 United Artists logo is a clear plaster.
Previews/Other Features: I’ve decided to bar this part of the rating, since neither of them have any previews due to the fact they were rental videocassettes.
Final Score: 39/50 (Diamonds), 38.5/50 (Golden Gun). Diamonds brings the win home for Connery, just by the skin of its tape.

Sorry about the delay. As I said last time, I've more or less been focusing on school and whatnot recently. I still don't have a completion timeframe, but I want to finish the season before... July, I guess. Not sure if I want to do a 2nd season yet.

Moving right along, this time YCP travels to face the first ranked opponent, Nebraska (#11). For those of you who don't know, Nebraska has been pretty decent over the years, but they went 5-6 in 2004. Their defense against the rush is their best asset, but they're pretty balanced overall. Their rush offense is pretty unimpressive though. In any case, this game will probably be more difficult than the last few, if only because I haven't even touched this game in weeks. Oh well. This game is very important, because YCP is not in the Top 25 yet. That has to change, and the best way to do so is to turn Nebraska into a laughing stock.

Oh, and HarvestmanMan was the Defensive Player of the Week for Week 4. #BeastMode.
Also, MAZZ0 "got into some trouble at a recent weekend party." So, MAZZ0 earned a 2 game suspension. Oops.

Summary:


Stats:


Closing Thoughts:
Well, it had to happen eventually. The opposing team finally scored on me. It was a rather embarrassing play too, since I missed some tackles. I guess at least the pressure to shutout every game is off now.

Offensively, I probably should have done better. I'm still not very good at passing, but I think that a lot of the drops just should not have happened. Rushing is still quite solid, and Intermission is now in the top 5 candidates for the Heisman Trophy. (If you don't know what that is, it is an award handed out to one player per year for exceptional performance. It's pretty tough to get, as you might imagine.) Rushing is also helped by the fact that the QB (tabull) can run just as good as any running back.

Defensively... it wasn't that bad. Other than that touchdown, Nebraska did very little. They got an occasional pass here or there, but CorruptionSound, BadBuffalo, and HarvestmanMan shut them down fairly well. I wish I had gotten more interceptions, though.

I'm still terrible at Kicking. That's all there is to it.

Next time, #19 Kansas State visits The Forum. See ya'll again in 2 months.

You most likely simply know me as Steg. I am that "guy" who used to make videos of Dr. Egg saying the penis. You may or may not know me beyond these videos. You are likely unaware that I am an emotional guy. I say guy, but some of you know me as a girl. And then there are those of you who know me as that guy who pretends to be a girl. But this post isn't about me being trans, it is about my ongoing battle with depression. I do not have a proper reason for writing this post. It is likely because I just want to vent my emotions a little bit. So sit back and enjoy a little story about the ups and mostly downs of my life. I have been thinking about this stuff a lot lately, and unfortunately have no one to talk to about it, so you people get to read it instead. Lucky you! I guess it's worth warning you that it may be pretty depressing.

I have been battling with mental health problems since around the age of 10, although they were not nearly as bad as they were back then as they are now. My first 4 years of primary school were simply. I just went to school and talked to my friends like everyone else did. But in my 5th year something happened and to this day I do not know what, but whatever it was it made everyone turn on me and started 3 years of constant bullying which I was barely able to deal with. The details of this are too much for me to want to talk about, but it was the beginning of what my life is today. Once I left primary school, things happened in my life which just made me scared to go outside through fear of being beaten up. The only time I left my house was to go to high school, and thankfully no one at the high school knew about my life and I didn't have any problems. High school was okay. I wasn't bullied, but I was a bit of a troublemaker which wasn't very nice, but I can at least say some of the moments in which I caused trouble were justified. But nothing is really worth mentioning. The things that happened to me in primary school and what was going on in my family life stuck with me through my 5 years of high school and some of it still sticks with me today, and it had a significant effect on how I performed in class, but nothing bad really happened.

But let's just fast forward to 2008, when I left high school. I tried to get into art college, as art was the only thing I was good at. I was good at other things, but I threw those away in high school because I was an idiot. Rugby and the violin are two things that spring to mind. But to escape from the problems I was having, I just made up little characters and drew comics with them. But no college would accept me. I am not sure why, my grades were good and I had grown out of my troublemaker phase. I have a feeling that my guidance teacher from high school is to blame as she always made things worse for me by giving me bad referals, but I can't be so sure. Anyway, the more I got rejected from college, the more I stopped caring. I tried to find jobs too, but nowhere wanted me. And I just fell into a deep depression, with some details I would rather not mention. I ended up just turning into the type of person who sits playing games all day, but I do not regret that. I made a very good friend in mid-2009, and we talked every single day and played games, and whenever I was feeling down he would always cheer me up, and I would also try to do the same for him. I still had no luck getting a job or into college, but I didn't stop trying. About a year later, I met someone and we started dating, so that was nice. But it wasn't enough to make me happy, as I just kept feeling worse with every single job/college that rejected me. And then eventually this one person who actually loved me started to reject me too, so that made me feel even worse.

So I bought a cat. A weird reaction to your life falling apart, but it worked. I called her Yuki, and I played with her every day and it always brightened me up. And then at last, I am accepted into college! I didn't get into the course I wanted, or even my second choice, but I didn't care, I just wanted to do something with my life. I stuck with college from 2011 to 2014, making friends and genuinely enjoying life for the first time. I started to go out more, traveling to England every few months to visit my friends and going to conventions around the UK. But when I left college, my life started to go downhill again. Here I was with a diploma in Travel and Tourism, and having hopes that maybe I could get a job traveling around as that was something I enjoyed doing, but everywhere rejected me still. Eventually, at the end of last year, I got a job working at a Royal Mail sorting office. Not something I thought I'd be doing after 4 years of studying travel, tourism and aviation, but oh well, a job is a job and I needed money. And even though all I had to do whilst working here was sort mail by postcodes and classes, it was pretty fun. I was working night-shifts so it was a nice way to spend the night, otherwise I'd have been spending it being unable to sleep. I wasn't there to make friends, so I just kept to myself most of the time, but on my second day of work I was paired up with a girl who I could tell liked me, and I liked her too. We got to know each other and became friends. Things happened to her though, and she had random panic attacks, and being the kind sole I am I stayed with her for hours and hours each day to make sure she was alright. Eventually we started dating, and I thought it was the turning point in my life. I had a job, I had a girlfriend, and I had friends.

And then came the new year. "Happy New Year!", people would say. There was nothing happy about it. The job I had was only temporary, however many people were asked to stay on after the new year. I wasn't one of those people. I was back to having no job. But hey, I still had everything else! But not for long. For some reason my best friend whom I had known since 2009 and who I mentioned had helped me through my depression decided he didn't like me anymore, and it broke my heart. It has been 3 months, and I have been trying to get in touch with him, but I have been ignored every single time and it hurts so much. He was the only reason I went on my computer, and the only person who I trusted enough to talk to about my problems. Whenever I try to play a game now, I am just reminded that I've lost the only person in the world I enjoyed playing these games with. Call me petty for caring so much about someone I played games with, but he was an important part of my life. I tried to accept it and just keep living my life, but it all got to me. I broke things off with the girl I was seeing because I wanted to make myself better and I cared too much about her to want her to deal with me, and thankfully she was understanding of that, however we don't talk anymore (although that is mainly to do with the fact I don't like talking to people, rather than avoiding each other). I started to see a therapist and after many sessions I was diagnosed with a mild form of schizophrenia. That, combined with the fact that throughout my life people - including my closest ever friend - seem to just turn on me for no reason, has resulted in me often going to great lengths just to avoid talking to anyone. I guess part of me thinks that I don't deserve friendship. It's funny how much your life can change in the space of a week. It doesn't help that there is so much hostility in this world everywhere I go. I go outside to the shops and I will see people being jerks. I'll go into town and I will see people ignoring someone in need. The news is filled with stories about murders and wars. I will log into Facebook and my news feed will be filled with people arguing over the stupidest of things. I do not want to point fingers, but even when I am here, a place which has always been here for me as a refuge from all the bad things in the world, I see people acting hostile towards other people for the stupidest of reasons, and that really gets to me. It baffles me as to why people in this world respond to negativity with further negativity. I know it's probably hilarious coming from someone as emotionally broken as I am, and probably even more hilarious to those of you who think I am nothing but a petty little troll, but responding to stupidity with aggression isn't the way to solve problems.

But I am sorry, I do not want to turn this into a "grr fuck you guys!!!" post. I honestly don't know my reasoning behind this post. I guess I had to vent my emotions some way, seeing as just 4 months ago I had the best friend I could ever hope for, a job, and a girlfriend. And then just like that, I have nothing, and don't even have anyone I trust enough to talk to about it. This is just a summary, as I guess I'm not really prepared to go into details publicly about any of this stuff. I don't know where my life is going. I am isolating myself from people and am quickly running out of money. The dreams I had just a few years ago are gone, and I now spend each day just sitting in bed watching the TV and occasionally playing video games, but as I mentioned earlier I do not enjoy video games very much anymore. Part of me believes that one day everything will be back to normal, and that I will have my friend back and can begin trusting people again. The more realistic part of me believes that I'd be lucky if I were to make it through another year.

Thank you for putting up with me. I am sorry if there have been times in when I have been a nuisance to any of you. When my emotions get the better of me, I say and do stupid things.

It may sound like it, but this is far from being a "farewell" post. I apologise if none of it makes any sense, as I do not wish to go back and read it. I am also afraid that someone will see this who I do not want to see it, so please don't be surprised if I want to delete it. One of the reasons I never talk about this stuff is because I am afraid that people follow me everywhere I go online and read everything I say so that they can make a big deal out of it and make me feel like shit because that is just how they get their kicks in life. I guess I'm just an easy target. Or maybe I am just paranoid.

#13 Kansas State @ YCP

To start, I know that I said that Kansas State was #19 last time. They moved up. Now, I don't care for Kansas State. I have nothing against the people who go there, but their football team has regularly beat The University of Texas over the past several seasons. If I've never made it clear, I'm quite a fan of UT football. Historically, UT has had one of the most successful (and profitable) college football programs in the country. Kansas State... not really. It's true that Texas has had a streak run of mediocre (and sometimes downright awful) seasons lately, but when they consistently lose to Kansas State... well you can imagine how disappointed I am. Rant over.

Kansas State went 4-7 in 2004, which is obviously pretty bad. As you might expect, real life doesn't always correlate perfectly to video games. In game, Kansas State has a very good defense against both the pass and the rush, and their rush offense is second to none. However, their pass offense is horrendous. Still, this probably won't be that bad. That will change in the next few games.

Summary:


Stats:


Closing Thoughts:
Despite the final result, this game was kinda frustrating. Several great plays were called back due to Clipping penalties, and like last time, there were probably a few passes that really shouldn't have been dropped. On the plus side, I knocked over the Sun Sphere kicking was basically flawless. No missed field goals and no penalties for kicking out of bounds.

On offense, it was almost nothing but rushing. appdirect really should be in the Heisman running sooner or later, since I basically rely on my FBs for most of the running now. I just have so little confidence in passing, possibly because I'm too eager for high risk, high reward, highlight reel material. I'll try to mix it up with shorter, less problematic passes. Still, one of the better passes was caught, but was fumbled very close to the endzone. Whoops.

As for defense, there's not much to say. It was another shutout, and the stats were pretty good. The CPU completed a decent pass every so often, but it wasn't much to worry about. The only things really worth noting are the two Interceptions, one of which was returned for 6 points. That's always fun.

Next time, YCP faces off against #1 Oklahoma. That's right, I get to play against the toughest opponent in the game, which happens to be one of my least favorite teams in all of sports. Hooray.

I decided to make this blog as a way to chronicle the development of a game I'm currently making, called Gray Snow. It's an adventure horror game that's based around subtlety and mental tricks, where your very surroundings shimmer with an ever growing sense of deeply buried malignancy towards you. The reason I'm making this blog is partly so I have a place to stuff my rambling about my game so I'm not being annoying, but also to provide a source of learning to those who are interested; learning by watching me learn, in a way. And unlike that one blog that I made like two years ago that I ended up abandoning, I've been working on this project for nearly a year now and have no sign of stopping, so expect regular updates.

--

Episode 1 - Starting Off by Saying Goodbye

Why am I saying goodbye? Well, I'm saying goodbye more specifically to the Unity build of the game that I've been working on for the past 8 months. I've done some thinking and I've decided that I'm building the game in Unreal Engine 4 as opposed to Unity 5. Why is that?

• Unreal Engine is simply better. Seriously, after giving it a spin, it's kind of insane how much stuff there is in it that Unity is totally lacking. A more coherent UI, massively better workflow, etc. I mean for Christ's sake, Unity doesn't even have a grid to place stuff on. Like, you have to actually place each little prop in the pixel right spot and just hope that it's aligned properly. That might be acceptable for an outdoor scene, but for an interior-based game like Gray Snow, it's a living nightmare, making sure every wall is lined up. Also, Unreal Engine's got a system called Blueprint, where instead of having to code logic line by line, it's all placed in little modules that you can link together. It's much more visually oriented and coherent than having to learn C# and program everything off of scripts you find off of the internet because I don't want to learn an entire language just so my character makes fucking footstep sounds goddamnit. The major downside to Blueprint is that it executes several times slower than actual straight code, but Gray Snow's an adventure game and, thus, fairly low on logic, so it shouldn't be a big deal.

• Unreal Engine looks better. Unity 5 got a pretty huge graphical update as it included global illumination, which is some fancy bullshit that makes lights bounce off of surfaces more realistically or something I don't know. That combined with the fact that image effects like film grain and depth of field are now free to use makes it so that you can make a pretty competent looking game, visually at least. However, it has no match with Unreal. Global illumination is old news to Unreal, and it's absurdly easy to make a near-photorealistic looking scene in it. Since graphical fidelity is important to Gray Snow (gotta get that immersion), it's all good.

Goddamn look at that mmm toasty graphics

• I've kind of dug myself into a hole. At the beginning, I was less making a game and more screwing about. Which means, I placed walls and stuff where they shouldn't be, did a very sloppy job, and made a lot of mistakes that have now come and bit me in the ass. Problem is, it's hard to build off of that. It's like laying down a crappy foundation, and then building a skyscraper on that foundation and woah you've got a crappy skyscraper. Sure, you could dig back down and rearrange the foundation, but it's a huge ordeal and you risk totaling the work you've spent a lot of time on, which means you've wasted your time. I feel like it's better that I start anew and create a fresh foundation with the knowledge and dedication that I've rounded up during my work on the Unity build of Gray Snow. That way, I can work on it knowing safely that my level won't fucking blow up in an overflow of errors and miscalculated UV meshes.

It's definitely going to be a pain in the ass migrating everything to a whole new engine, but it's for the better, both in the short term workflow of the project and the long term vision for the game. Also I hope this didn't sound like an advertisement for Unreal or anything. I'm just pretty excited of how much more streamlined it is over Unity. It's quite the relief.

Anyway, in the future, I'll probably talk a little more about the artistic and aesthetic aspect of Gray Snow and go more into detail at the (hopefully) unique type of horror and atmosphere I'm trying to achieve. I hope this was at least mildly interesting to someone.

A rant copied and pasted staight from my tumblr.

For real, who actually likes people that wear glasses (without lenses mind you) JUST to look “cool” or “fashionable”. For christ’s sake, you look like a plebeian and probably are one. As a person who needs glasses, I’m not offended per-say, but I’m just dumbfounded of how fucking stupid this practice is. For example, you absolutely WOULD NOT ride in a goddamn wheelchair or wear a hearing aid to be fashionable. I just wonder how it feels to be some fucker out there that touts eyewear with no purpose whatsoever. They’re not sunglasses you’re wearing, nor are they actual fucking seeing glasses due to being near/far sighted. They maybe look good to you, but to everybody else (I’m quite certain), will hate you the second they notice that the troglodyte ordering some recuperable morning beverage is wearing dollar store bought, thick-rimmed, no lensed, fashion fucking statement. Of course, this statement is the outcry of every dimwitted boob that wears fake glasses… And probably possesses a scarf and a fedora. On a side note, is the fedora the symbol of douchebaggery as well? I’m Just wondering. In conclusion, a pimp named slick back deserves and gets more respect than these sons of bitches. Just take the glasses off, your delusion of having fake glasses is fucking pitiful.
My opinion (or opion) [TG]