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The Blog of Soni Ku - The YouTube Poop World - Current Progress

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How's it going? I just wanted to let you guys know that the The YouTube Poop World - the YTP RPG that I'm working on - is NOT dead. I also want to tell you about the current progress on the 1.2 update. Here's a tiny little Excel chart that I may or may not use to indicate how done the update is in the future.

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So yeah.

If you want to learn more about this game, go to this link below. Or the Hub forum. Whichever works for you.

http://youchew.net/forum/index.php?/topic/111153-the-youtube-poop-world-a-very-odd-rpg/

Grease Witherspoon Blog - Captain America 1979: Worst Superhero Movie of All Time or Worst Movie Period?

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I'm a fan of awesomely bad and cheesy movies as well as a fan of superheroes and superhero movies. I've seen a lot of obscure superhero movies in my day but I think I saw what might be the worst superhero film ever. I'm talking about the 1979 Captain America movie.

If you want to see a captain america movie where captain america never throws his shield, punches anyone or does anything cool other than riding a captain america themed motorcycle then this movie is for you. He doesnt even wear the captain america suit until over an hour into the movie and his 'shield' looks like it's made from clear plastic with some spray paint over it. They made captain america look like evel knievel for some reason.

At least there were a few laughs as half the lines in the movie could be taken as bad sexual innuendos and pretty much all the dialogue felt forced. And pretty much the only reason I wanted to watch it was to see Captain America fight nazis or the red skull or at least some costumed villain but nope the bad guy is just some old business guy in a suit who has a heart attack the minute he's confronted with captain america so he needs to be resuscitated. That's right, captain america doesn't even fight the main bad guy he just gives up the minute captain america shows up. The bad guy spends most of the time leading up to the climax sitting down reading a book next to a bomb. Captain America doesn't even resuscitate the bad guy, he calls his boss in to do it.

The movies production values are on par with the incredible hulk tv show from the 70s, in fact captain america feels like an hour and a half tv pilot for a terrible captain america tv show that thankfully never was. The only good thing about the movie was Len Birman's hilarious performance as Captain Americas mentors. Every line of dialogue he speaks sounds like an ominous narrator rather than a person talking to someone else.

Watching this really made me appreciate the modern Captain America movie a lot more. Also, the reason I saw this pile of garbage was because I had it mixed up with the horribly cheesy 1990 Captain America movie that I wanted to see. At least that one has action, a better costume and the red skull.

In Other Words - Spice Up Singleplayer With Your Own Craftbukkit Server

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I've gotten all up into configuring and running Minecraft servers between co-administrating the Outpost with Robotnikman and running my own server on my VPS. Craftbukkit, hands down, could either be the best mod or tie for best alongside Forge.

One thing you might mistake, though, is that Craftbukkit is something you only run on a remote host and have other people besides yourself play on, but having to often quality assure the plugins and permissions I configure, running a local Craftbukkit instance is an invaluable way to learn what works and what doesn't before making it available to other players. BUT, I've stopped and considered more than once, could a local Craftbukkit also be an invaluable way to play?

Well, that was a stupid question since odds are any modern server you play on runs Craftbukkit to pick up the slack vanilla leaves in its player permissions and protections. So yes--it's an invaluable way to play. Especially when you stop to consider new ways of playing the game it can bring to singleplayer.

Forge is often touted as the numero uno mod(loader) for Minecraft and I'll admit that in terms of adding new content, it's unparalleled. Bukkit works in a way that's so completely different comparing what the two of them do is apples and oranges, whereas Forge adds new content to the game, Bukkit attempts to stretch and expand the gameplay. Respectfully, both I think keep the game fresh and I don't think either does a better job than the other without being weaker in different areas. Craftbukkit, for example, cannot add any sort of new block or item to the game as far as editing the tags and block data of existing items. Forge, however, lacks a lot of command based mods that most Craftbukkit plugins are based on (such as our beloved Essentials plugin).

One mistake you cannot make, however, is thinking that when seeing a cool mod it can load up easily into Craftbukkit. I generally have two rules of finding compatability in plugins which is if it 1) adds new blocks, items and mobs to Minecraft and 2) isn't found on http://dev.bukkit.org/bukkit-plugins/ then it will not work. Usually because those mods are Forge based. I've heard requests more than once for mods to be implemented onto the Outpost which can never run because they're for Forge and not Craftbukkit.

That being said, let's see what Craftbukkit can do to make singleplayer a little more interesting without having to use any client mods. I recommend at the very least you have 4gb of RAM which will be more than enough to run the server and your client at the same time.

Installing Craftbukkit

Firstly, I'm assuming that you run Windows. If not, I'm sorry that you have to game on a non-Windows PC (jk jk). It's really quite simple. First, make a new folder on your desktop named Bukkit (or name it anything--it doesn't really matter). You'll then need two things which is the server jar file and a launch script so you don't have to manually start it from the command line every time you run it. Here's a relatively easy launch script--
java -Xmx1024M -jar craftbukkit.jar -o true
PAUSE
Spoiler


Use a simple text editor like notepad to create this file, and save it in the Bukkit folder as start.bat. If you're a little lean on memory then you can change -Xmx1024M to -Xmx512M. This signifigantly reduces the amount of memory the server will use, however this means fewer plugins will be able to run simultaneously. If you've got the memory to spare and want to use a bunch of plugins simultaneously you can specify it as maybe 1536M (1.5gb) or 2048 (2gb). Just remember to leave enough for your client to play as well. There's a few more verbose arguments you can use such as setting permgen memory size, startup memory, but this simple one above get's the job done without being too technical.
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Speaking of Notepad, if you're going to configure server files you're going to need something with a bit more power than Notepad. Notepad++ will better configure .yml files which is predominantly the format you'll find most bukkit plugin conf files in.

Also, after you download the server jar you'll want to name it simply to craftbukkit.jar which will reflect the jar file specified in the script.... or change the script to specify the jar you're using. I prefer doing the former.

Running the Server

After you have created the start script, you should be able to launch the server by running this script. Craftbukkit will generate the default folders and files it needs to run and you can monitor the server from the command console that the script opened. You can use that to perform basic Minecraft commands such as /op [yourself], /ban [jerk] or /stop which will gracefully stop the server (never just close the console or you might lose world save progress. Always /stop). If you op yourself, you can perform all these commands ingame. It's essentially the same as having cheats enabled on LAN.

From your Minecraft client, you can now connect to this server by selecting Multiplayer, Add Server and then setting localhost or 127.0.0.1 as the server address.

By default, it's gonna feel a lot like vanilla survival.... because for the most part, it is. I have a few fun suggestions, however, to spice up SSP. These will all generally come in .jar files which you place in the plugins folder of your server's folder. After craftbukkit loads the mods during startup, it will generate their respective folders and configuration files in the plugins folder. I recommend, however, /op'ping yourself and playing that way so you don't have to dive too far into things such as having to get a permissions plugin and setting it up for just yourself to play on.

ExtraHardMode

I gave this a spin on the Wooden Axe's Origin server. I like to call it Asshole Minecraft, myself. For the full effect, I recommend playing it without Essentials. Y'see, this adds a lot of challenge to survival gameplay. If you don't have a bed spawn set, you are re-spawned thousands of blocks away from where you die, having to start entirely from scratch. Dirt and cobblestone are also prone to gravity in EHM. No more dirt or cobble bridges across wide gaps like lava in the nether or a bridge across the ocean. It's also not uncommon in EHM for dirt to have cave-ins from underneath and likely suffocate you to death.

Rain snuffs out torches, you can't place torches down at diamond layer (fucking hate this), your pickaxes have signifigantly less durability so stripmining is pointless. Zombie Pigmen are always hostile in the Nether. I could go on and on, but if you're a huge fan of survival and hard difficulty or Hardcore don't do it for you, this is what you want. Prove your mettle and do a combination of Adventure mode (/gamemode 2) and Hardcore while playing this, and you are a Minecraft God. Hardcore can be enabled on the server by going to the bukkit folder, opening the server properties file and setting Hardcore to TRUE (for which you have to delete or rename the current world folder and let craftbukkit generate a new one).

Dynmap

Dynmap is a map of your server's world viewable from your browser! Personally, I don't see as much use for Dynmap as I do for Zan's Minimap with well appointed waypoints. But the advantage Dynmap has over a minimap is that the whole world is viewable which, if you're like me, make it easy to find builds you lose and can never find again. It's very satisfying, I've found, to take an exising world in your .minecraft folder and use it on the server and be able to see the whole of the world you've discovered from an overhead view. I've found some builds I lost ages ago because I built them too far away from the spawnpoint with Dynmap.

WorldBorder

WorldBorder can set limits on how far you can travel out in your world. Initially, this might not seem useful or beneficial to SSP, but take into consideration the /fill and /trim commands worldborder adds to the game. If you set the borders of your world to maybe 3000 block in all directions, you can use /fill to begin generating all the undiscovered chunks you haven't explored (combine that with dynmap and you have an all encomapassing worldmap). Or if your world is getting a bit too big and you'd like to save some precious hard disk space, /trim will being removing unloaded chunks outside the worlds border (hope you don't have anything out that far you wouldn't mind losing!).

A note about /fill, though, is that it's going to suck up quite a bit of hard disk space to fill in all the chunks. Unless you have hundreds of gigabytes you aren't using, /fill isn't that great an idea.

Essentials

The use for this in SSP should almost be self-explanatory when you take into consideration home setting and warps.

Craftbook

Craftbook brings a lot of fun, automation features to Minecraft. Such as creating toggleable gates, light switches, bridges and new uses for redstone with IC's. I've personally found gobs of ways to use IC's to automate tasks such as endlessly breaking and collecting cobblestone from lava/water cobble generators. There's also the cultivator which automatically tills land around it and a planter which fills the tilled land with seeds. It really mititgates the tediousness often collecting materials can create while giving you more time to focus on building.

Worldedit

This is a bit of a stretch. Yeah, it's honestly a creative tool, not survival. But there's really two unwieldy things about Worldedit client installs vs using it on a bukkit server in that with SinglePlayerCommands I'm personally not keen on modifying the Minecraft jar file with individual mods opposed to being loaded through Forge or Craftbukkit. SinglePlayerCommands/Worldedit, however, does not yet have a Forge version. It works wonderfully on Craftbukkit, though, and from my own personal experience SPC client installs were often buggy and inaccurate.

You can go to http://dev.bukkit.org/bukkit-plugins/ to find more plugins which can enhance singleplayer Minecraft. Sure, sure--you could just play on a server, yeah. But sometimes if you're like me you just like to get away from the chat boxes and PVP.... or maybe your internet's down and vanilla singleplayer doesn't do it for you anymore.

Jallerbo Bojallerson's Spectacularly Monotonous Blog - ANGER // RELEASE

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I oftentimes find a bitter, but comfortable solace in feeding this insatiable anger.


It's the variety of anger you feel when there is nothing tangible at which to direct it. It's the agony of a dying love that devours you from the inside out like a swarm of starving maggots pulsing beneath the flesh of the recently deceased. It's the feeling of surviving your own inevitable destruction only to be condemned to a life as a disfigured and monstrous shadow of your former self. It's the coldness felt when looking into eyes full of disgust and contempt upon a smiling familiar face. And it is the distress that comes with the feeling of abandonment graced upon your shivering form whilst lying alone in a puddle of crimson.


There is however, an escape from this anger that threatens to burn uncontrollably until it reduces my already fractured vessel into a pile of ashes that shall blow away with the cold wind and become caught in the throats of those whom I cherish, turning to tar in their already decaying lungs.


It's the kind of escape felt in the sting of the icy blade sliding across your unsightly pale skin, leaving behind an exquisite stream of red. It's the sweet relief felt in every drop of blood spilled by your hand, whether it belong to the guilty or innocent. It's the joy of letting your anger lash out like a solar flare and watching as it blisters the Earth itself, devoid of any conscience or remorse. And it shall be the comforting release expressed through involuntary sputters and coughs upon feeling the welcome embrace of the rope tightening around your aching neck.

Grease Witherspoon Blog - My Review of Robocop (2014)

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The robocop reboot is fucking awesome. Instead of depicting the excess and corruption of America in the 1980s the reboot focuses on the problems facing modern America in the near future. Like the original, the reboot is thought provoking, has great action sequences and is at times hilarious. There were lots of subtle and not so subtle nods to the original Robocop which I really appreciated. The reboot isn't nearly as edgy or violent as the original but it does have a lot of heart and it does a great job of making you care about Alex Murphy and his family.

My only complaints were very small ones as the movie has a smart script filled with nods to the original robocop and the whole cast was wonderful. However, there were a few scenes were they decided to use handicam which was annoying and distracting much like it was at the begging of Man of Steel. When will Hollywood realize everyone hates shaky camera movements? Just because a few successful movies used it doesnt mean that the shakycam had anything to do with their success. It didn't ruin the movie and fortunately it's only in a few scenes near the beginning. Also, there are several points in the movie where robocop is looking at footage of crimes and people having conversations and the movie doesnt make it clear where the heck that footage came from. I guess we are to believe there are cameras and microphones everywhere at all times in the near future? Also, the movie could have used another action scene. There was action throughout the movie but I felt like it was a little lighter on action sequences than I expected from a robocop reboot. Again, these are all minor complaints as I enjoyed the movie all throughout.

I really hope Robocop does well and that we get sequels as there is definitely potential for more robocop movies. I think the mixed reaction from critics is primarily due to this being a reboot but even most of the negative reviews aren't too scathing as the reboot is at very least better than many would expect. I didn't have high expectations going into it but it had me from the first scene and only got better. Honestly, Robocop 3 came out decades ago and was a financial disaster. Plus nobody cares about any of the robocop tv shows so they either had to leave the franchise alone or they had to reboot it and there was too much potential for it to make money for them to leave it alone. But Robocop fans can rest easy knowing that this is one reboot that doesn't feel like it's just a shallow rehash going through the motions but rather it takes the soul of the original and repurposes it, much like alex murphy was repurposed when he was transformed into Robocop.

The Blog of Soni Ku - The YouTube Poop World - 1.2 Released!

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After three months of development, the 1.2 update of the YouTube Poop World (aka the John/Hank Fapfic Update) has been completed and released! It includes the first two of the many expansions planned for the game, as well as several tweaks and improvements. These include a questlog to find out where the hell you are, an improved battle system, and the fixing of several odd bugs.

You must create a new game in order to fully experience the effects of this update, however.

Download link: https://mega.co.nz/#!kBkWUBga!S0V-03mO-0MDjYBsLNfWVcdEfwJoph6wuofn2_RcBB4

Thread: http://youchew.net/forum/index.php?/topic/111153-the-youtube-poop-world-a-very-odd-rpg/

Changelog:
Spoiler


:botnikhappy:


"Snooping as usual, I see?"

SixFourImpala's Blog - the first of many

SixFourImpala's Blog - banner I made


Suds Makes a Game - Introduction

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Hi! And welcome to my blog! The purpose of this blog will be to write about my progress through a personal project of mine. The project in question is "Space Nuts," one of the two games my friends and I are working on.

Thing is, I already made Space Nuts while I was in college for my programming class. Unfortunately, the program we were forced to use was Playstation Mobile, a C# IDE specifically used to make games for the Playstation Vita and nothing else. I really enjoyed making the game, but since the only way the game could be played was on the IDE's simulator, I wanted to remake it on something with a wider variety of distribution.


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Some pictures of the original Space Nuts


Since my friend was already working on his own game in Java, I decided I would do the same to make it easier for the two of us (along with another friend who's assisting us in making our games).

Notice how the original Space Nuts is lacking in the graphical department. That's because my friends and I suck at art, so while I will try to make the new SN better graphically, it probably won't be anything more than flat until I can find an artist to make it look prettier. That being said, this blog will focus mainly on the programming aspect of development.

For every entry/update I make I'll be sure to zip up what I have and upload it to some file sharing site so you guys can try it out for yourselves. If you do, feel free to leave feedback, suggestions, anything you want to share.

I've already done a very small bit of work on the game already, so I'll be making another entry either later tonight or tomorrow. Hope you guys enjoy the blog!

Suds Makes a Game - Making Stars

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Yesterday, after a few days of just fucking around, I finally got to work on making my game. The very first thing I wanted to do what to make something the original game didn't have; a background. After all, flying around in space can be pretty dull when you're apparently flying in a huge void emptiness with nothing going on. So I decided that I would give the background a few moving stars, at least for the splash and menu screens.

Of course the first thing I needed to do was actually make the stars appear on screen. First, I made 3 tiny squares and clumped them together into a single image that the game would extract the individual stars from. To make sure everything worked as I wanted it to, I started off by just making the 3 stars appear in set positions.

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The star sheet.

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The stars appearing on the screen. Note that the largest star was later removed and replaced with a tiny 2x2 one.

Next, I made the stars move across the screen, first at the same speed, then with each given a different speed. There was an issue where the stars would appear to "stretch" because I forgot to fill the screen each time the game updated, but that was quickly resolved.

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The stars moving across the screen, with and without the "stretching"

Finally, the fun part. I made a List of Sprites and filled it with 10 stars, each with 1 of the 3 given sizes and a random position on the screen. Then, I made the stars move across the screen with speeds depending on the size(or in this case how far away the star appears to be). Finally, when a star moves off of the screen, the star is removed from the List, and replaced with a brand new one of varying size on the other side.

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Final result. It looks a lot cooler when it's moving.

Now the game has a neat little moving star background! As of yet, that's all the game has, but it's still really nice to look at. If you want to try out the game yourself, you can get it here. Just unzip the folder and double-click the .jar file. If you do try it out, let me know what you think. I'd really appreciate it.

Until next time~

Spongey's Blog - Ten Recommended Poops of February 2014

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Another months has come and gone, and now it's time for some more underrated poops. This time I'm not going to give my summary for why I liked it so much, this time you can watch them and make your own conclusion.


1. FATAL BERT II by Konanarian, JowlHog, Dieathan and Markie


2. Mormon Church Hentai, find out what you can do by KlausTheWizard


3. NO VIbES, NO bEVIS by CornedBeefSuprise


4. WELCOME TO THE MAGIC WORLD OF ALPHABET by thapoint09


5. THE NUTPOCALYPSE COMETH by Nineroe


6. {YTP} ~ Pensiman by Gab H.


7. AVGN plays Hotel Tom and Jerry (Saban Dub) by YamiMario


8. 100 Ways To Rape In Super Mario 64 by MrVanderschmere


9. Sam Pligrim vs The Merchants at Precalculus by Cornflakes


10. YTP: The end of all common sense and rational thought by FeedEgg

In Other Words - MCPC+ Makes the .jar Go Yonder

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I've turned my eyes recently back to Hexxit Minecraft, the adventure themed Forge modpack. It can be recalled for a short time in January I hosted a Hexxit server but was never satisfied with how I maintained it.

On a typical Minecraft server, you'll mostly find that you administrate through the Multicraft (or a MyMCAdmin) web control panel. Shoot, I generally run one myself since it provides easy, visual cues and structures most of us can easily work with. But running a Hexxit server through Multicraft just never launched the jar file and gave me errors about the server not being writable. Multicraft aside, I really wanted to host a Hexxit server to play with some of my friends. I mean... most of us can admit by now that playing singleplayer Minecraft is just balls. I love singleplayer games far more than multiplayer, personally, but Minecraft is really a social game and best played with other people.

Hosting the server, then, entailed brushing up a lot on using the Linux shell through SSH. Easy enough it was merely going to the directory I kept the server files in and using a bash script that's nearly identical the the Craftbukkit launch script I mentioned in a previous entry to start the server. Back then, though, I had two problems which was 1). My VPS only had 1gb of memory which was painfully nowhere near enough to run any sort of Forge server with and 2). because of this lack of memory the server tended to crash a lot and could not resume normal gameplay until I manually started the server again. This was tedious, as it needed done several times a day, often the crashes occurring while I was at work and could do nothing about it. When the server was actually up, though, we all had a blast destroying Battle Towers and finding rare treasures and artifacts which could never be found in vanilla Minecraft. God, it was so much fun but the maintenance was just horrifically tedious and I ended up just stopping the server with no warning and went back to running a plain-jane craftbukkit server nobody played on or knew existed

More recently, though, I got a little anxious to start playing Hexxit again and bought the extra gigabyte of memory my server needed, and found a marvelous script which ran as a cron job every five minutes to see if the server was running and if not, started it. Boom--there was the automation I needed. The server's back up, and I have no intention to bring it down again unless for maintenance.

I'll tell you something that sucks about Forge, though--it's completely deplorable in terms of admin and protection tools. For most of the server's life-span I used ForgeEssentials which has always been a beta project which as best I know has been abandoned. It essentially had all the things you'd want for protecting your server and making things easier for your players with home and teleportation commands, but the problem was that none of the modules worked all that well or fell flat in features. Imagine Worldedit where the only things you could do was set positions and //setblock--that was more or less what you got with ForgeEssentials' Worldcontrol. Or setting permissions on a group over and over which are never applied. I kept it light on what I allowed players to do with FE since it was very easily broken.

I had heard about MCPC+ which was essentially everybody's dream server that ran bukkit plugins and loaded forge mods. I had always been skeptical and wasn't interested in using something that clearly promised too much and couldn't possibly deliver, but I was dead wrong. For one thing, my server was still essentially just a modded vanilla server, and it was still inefficient as fuck. The lag was often painful and drove me to lower the chunk loading as low as 8 chunks which made a noticeable change, but not enough so to completely eliminate server lag. My server pings usually between 120-200ms, which is horrible. MCPC+, however, is built on Spigot (which is in turn built on Craftbukkit). Spigot generally well-optimizes gameplay and chunk loading while maintaining compatibility with Bukkit plugins. Taking a chance I set the launch script to use the MCPC+ jar, and relaunching the server it generated what I was so anxious to see--a plugins folder.

Runing MCPC+ and keeping the chunk loading down low has increased the performance on my Hexxit server so much, it's unbelievable. If I could only find something like EntityGuard that worked on Craftbukkit 1.5.2 to keep mob spawning to more conservative amounts, I'd say the performance would be comparable to running a standard Craftbukkit server.

Having access to use Bukkit plugins on MCPC+ server is invaluable and has allowed me to install a proper permissions plugin, the Essentials plugin we all know and love, Lockette for privating containers and doors, the light but powerful Prism for block logging and what I thought would be the strongest addition to a Hexxit based server--MCMMO, the skill and leveling based RPG plugin.

I'm a happy man at the moment. Things like this really give me a sense of accomplishment and pride knowing how to take so many individual pieces and put them together to form my favorite all time game. And I know I probably shouldn't be too proud--I mean, it's not like I wrote the bash script, assembled the modpack, or coded the bukkit plugins or forge mods but when I think that back in the summer of 2012 when I bought a game on DinnerWarrior's recommendation, spawned in an ocean and drowned my first day playing it's weird to think that now I'd be running my own Minecraft server and co-administrating another with Robotnikman.

So yeah--I've got the fantasy and adventure based Hexxit Minecraft server if you're into that. Grab the technic launcher and select the Hexxit modpack--it'll download and patch all the files for you and you can connect to my server at revisionistfables.com. I've changed the permissions around enough so that you're good to start building and playing without waiting around for me to add you to the player group.

If you're into things like guns, FPS minigames, vehicles, and challenge dungeons or if you want to build in or look at YouChew's old worlds from the old days you can drop by Robotnikman's server at the-outpost.org. The spirit of Minecraft is still strong on YouChew and we've a loyal group of regular players we'd love to add you to.

Blog of the Harvestman - Poops I've made that are actually worth watching. I think.

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So, I'm exiting the YTP business/game/whatever after creating them for six or seven years. This is a sort of highlight reel and a reference as to what's actually worth bothering with.

When I first heard that there was a Filmation Star Trek cartoon, I just knew that it had to be unintentionally funny. And it was. It was also very easy to poop, which resulted in "Spock Finds A Curious Device On His Curious Console".



Around 2007 and 2008, I was a big Sonic fan. This was the cause of a great many cringeworthy memories which, if I could physically locate them in my brain, I would be more than happy to carve out of my head. One of my favorite videos from this time period was an AMV of Tails the Fox with Simple Plan's "I'm Just A Kid". Looking back on how ridiculously angsty that whole thing was, I thought that pooping it was the best thing to do. (A big-name pooper made something similar - Dikekike made "My Sincerest Regards To Debra Jo Rupp" from an AMV with Tails and Simple Plan's "Untitled". Sadly, no one appears to have saved the video before his account disappeared.) In regards to the ending, it's hard to tell due to the low quality, but Tails is starting at a record called "Four Walls" by Jim Lowe.



I had watched Thomas the Tank Engine as a kid, but never thought to poop it because KeeperOfPorridge and WTLNetwork had pretty much set the standard. I don't think this is as good as anything that they've done, but I do like some of the jokes in the beginning.



This one, I think, is the best poop I've ever made. It is, not coincidentally, also the largest Premiere project file on my hard drive! This one took a ton of time and effort to make, and I actively deleted the parts that weren't up to snuff (which is somewhat rare). Surprise surprise - it still didn't make it into Stu's I.M. Meen collab, which it was an entry for. Oh well.



There you have it. Enjoy.

Yoshit's Shitty Rants - Dungeons and Dragonites: A Review of "Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Gates to Infinity"

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As you, of course, know, I am a fan of Pokemon. When I bought my Japanese model 3DS at a game shop in Sasebo, I hadn't any games (except Star Fox 64 3D), so I also bought a couple games. As Mario Kart 7 had yet to even see Japanese game shelves, I chose 2 Pokemon games: Pokemon Black 2 (granted, a regular DS game), and Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Gates to Infinity as an actual 3DS game.

Most reviews I have seen tended to be negative in regards to the game, but fuck them all, as this is MY review.

So, what did I find upon popping the white cartridge in to my "new" (actually used) 3DS? Well, let me show you...

For the sake of my review, I will review this game, and any future games, on a 1-5 scale in multiple categories.

Story (3/5): The story behind the game is that you are a human that became a Pokemon (of your choice), and fell through the sky and hit the ground. Another Pokemon (also of your choosing) finds you, and teams up with you. Shit happens, you do a few adventures, and also portals start forming randomly. Yes, there is more than that, but, sadly, I am not fluent in Japanese, so I cannot really get in to it as deep. Not really that special, but a minor note.

Gameplay (5/5): Now here is where the game shines. As you can obviously tell by the title, this is a dungeon crawler with Pokemon. And it is totally awesome. Fusing the elements of Pokemon battling with dungeon crawling, this game has you exploring various maze-like caverns to accomplish whichever objective is at hand, while also finding various items and coins and other things. The dungeons are full of items, enemy Pokemon, and even traps. You have your partner to help you, but once he dies, you have to fend for yourself. And sometimes, you encounter a hoard of enemy Pokemon ready to kill your arse. The dungeons will keep you engaged the whole time, and will even make you want to keep exploring.

Graphics (4/5): Like most modern Pokemon spinoffs, Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Gates to Infinity has the same 3d-rendered Pokemon and backgrounds as most others on the Wii. With that in mind, you also get some 3D effects, mostly in cutscenes. For a handheld, the graphics are actually fairly good, without any sign of pixellation or compression, down to the actual LCD pixels. But, with that in mind, the graphics are not necessarily anything special.

Music (2/5): The music is not really special, with tracks mostly inspired by the old British isles (which is, granted, fitting, based on an English-looking landscape in the game), with violins and flutes mostly. I will say, though, that when the Pokemon hoard music starts playing, it does evoke a kind of "Oh, shit.." But, other than that, not really particularly special.

Replay Value (5/5): Perhaps what makes the game worth it is the nearly infinite replay value. In addition to continuing the story mode with new dungeons even after beating the game, you can also take a round object, such as a bowl, cup, or 1940s oscilloscope screen (which I did), and make a dungeon out of it. Since each new dungeon is completely new, you will never find yourself memorizing the dungeons.

Overall: 4 out of 5. While most reviewers have given negative reviews to Gates to Infinity, I, personally, believe that it is a very good game, and worthy of a purchase. It is a very fun game, with nearly infinite replay value. What more could you ask for?

Grease Witherspoon Blog - The Disaster Artist Review (The True Story of The Room)

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I just got done reading one of the best books ever written. The Disaster Artist is a true story that feels like a hilarious and touching mix of The Great Gatsby and Ed Wood. It's a story about the making of the most awesomely terrible movie of all time 'The Room' (2003) as well as a story about dreams and a bizarre odd couple friendship.

The Room has become one of the biggest cult classics of the past decade and has been hailed as 'the citizen kane of bad movies'. For those who aren't familiar with The Room, its charm lies in its completely uncharasmatic, baffling and mysterious writer/director/producer/lead actor Tommy Wiseau. The film is clearly Wiseau's $6 million dollar vanity project. Wiseau's past and where he got his vast fortune remain a mystery. The Room breaks nearly every possible convention of film and logical thinking imaginable and fails at accomplishing anything it seeks out to accomplish but ultimately it succeeds in being one of the best unintentional comedies of all time.

Over a decade after the films release Wiseau still tours the country doing crowded midnight screenings in which the audience participates in various ways. No matter how many times I see The Room it never fails to entertain me and there are always new mistakes or baffling inconsistencies to spot. Deconstructing the many layers of insanity of the Room is an enjoyable challenge for those such as myself who enjoy awesomely bad movies. The Room's greatest strength is that it feels like it's genuinely trying to be a great drama but failing at every turn. The movie doesn't appear to be winking at the audience despite its absurdity. The first half of the movie could easily be mistaken for a bad porno before the movie descends further and further into Wiseau's ego-driven madness.

The Disaster artist is told from the perspective of another lead actor in the film (Greg Sestero). The book chronicles Greg's ambition as a young man to be a movie star. Along the way, Greg encounters the insanity that is Tommy Wiseau and the two form an unlikely friendship that eventually leads to a behind the scenes view of Greg's experiences working on The Room.

As a long time fan of the movie, I was overwhelmed with excitement to discover just how twisted Wiseau really is and just how absurd the filming of the Room was. It's a miracle that the movie was ever finished and that the film became the cult hit that it has become.

I'd recommend the book to anyone even if you haven't seen The Room or if you don't even like bad movies. There is something incredible about Wiseau as a character as he continually demonstrates some of the most absurd and off-putting behavior imaginable but somehow still manages to be likable in his own unique way. Through Greg's eyes Wiseau appears to be a sympathetic character because of his fearlessness and his unrelenting determination to make himself a star against all odds. It's been a long time since I read a book that was this difficult to put down.

Interestingly enough, Seth Rogan and James Franco are working on adapting the Disaster Artist into a movie. While I definitely look forward to that, I think the movie will be somewhat divergent from the book as a lot of the book relies on Greg's internal thoughts and feelings about his experiences with the infamous Tommy Wiseau.

Cloaytonem2's Things & Stuff - Installing, Using, and Exporting from Microsoft Chat Character Editor

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Alright, to add some interest into the Microsoft Comic Chat that a lot of us have been using and to make it more interesting, I decided to make a tutorial for getting the character editor for the program to work on newer machines. I will list step-by-step everything I did to run it as well as all the minute details about the program you'll probably need to keep in mind.

First, download the program from here. That site also has the chat program, characters, and backgrounds as well if you'd like to download those as well.

Next, run the installer.
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You don't actually need to close anything out. Just proceed as normal until you get an error.

Now when this error comes up, copy the link it has and paste it in the address bar of an explorer window. It says it can't find the file, but all the files are there.
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Copy the files over to a new folder. You can delete this folder when you're done, since it's just to store the files until the installer's done.

Now just press cancel and yes several times. It'll take a while.
Now go to the folder it was installed in (usually Program Files\Microsoft Chat Character Editor). You may find a few files that made it. The rest were denied access. Those are all in the new folder, so just move the files in that folder back into the program folder and allow access yourself.

The program still won't run properly right now because it needs to be in compatibility mode to actually do anything. Right-click the program file (ccedit.exe), choose "properties," select the compatibility tab, and set it to run in compatibility mode for Windows 98.

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It should run fine now, just don't choose open and just click the character editor files as an alternative. It'll close otherwise. If there are any problems with that or you know of a better way, let me know and I'll adjust this section.

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Now the program itself. It's actually relatively simple to use, as it's pretty much MS Paint with actions attached. Start up the program and choose "New" to get started.

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Fill in all the information you need. The explanations are at the top. One thing to keep in mind is that there's also no alpha channel, hence why you need to choose a transparent color instead. Every image from the clipboard with transparencies will turn them black when pasted into the program. Everything else is explained, make sure to read everything is says on the window because it's all pretty important.

The program starts us with a neutral pose. Let's put this picture of Sonic in there. Also, "Import" closes the program like "Open" does, and I have no idea what it's supposed to do anyway, so just copy/paste the image from an image editor or such. You can also just draw it if you want.

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Remove this green screen, add the head center marker (red crosshair in the bottom-left of the tools) and we got ourselves a pose. I'm not gonna try that hard right now because this is just for an example and I don't even have all of the poses right now.

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We can either make a whole new pose or add another emotion to an existing pose. Let's add another pose, so go to "Character" and choose "Add Pose" or just press Ctrl+P.

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Here we have a field for the pose name and the emotion we want it associated with first. The emotions from Laugh to Coy have an intensity determined by where the marker is placed when using the character, with 1 being the most intense and is furthest from the center and 10 being closest. Here are the emotions:

Neutral: When the marker is in the center or you simply don't move the marker after sending a message. While other emotions can only have one pose associated with it, you can have multiple neutral poses that the program will cycle through.
Laugh: Self-explanatory. Will also trigger highest intensity when "lol" is typed.
Bored: Self-explanatory. Nothing I know of will trigger this via text.
Angry: Self-explanatory. Same as above.
Happy: Self-explanatory, triggered by a happy face emoticon
Scared: Self-explanatory.
Shout: LOTS OF YELLING. TYPING IN ALL CAPS TRIGGERS HIGHEST INTENSITY
Sad: Self-explanatory, triggered by a sad emoticon
Coy: Smug
Point To Self: This one can only be triggered by text. It's triggered by a sentence starting with "I."
Point To Other: This can also only be triggered via text, with this one being any sentence with "you" in it.
Wave: This one's only triggered with greetings and farewells, such as "hello," "hi," "bye," etc.

Other than Neutral, you cannot have more than one pose for an emotion('s specific intensity), so find a good one to use for each.

When you got all the poses you want set to the emotions you want, you will also need a character icon for the first comic panel and the user list on the side, which is as simple as creating the character, just really tiny and without a transparency color

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Now, there's one more important thing to do before we're done. In order for others to see it instantly, we need to set up an automatic download link. There are multiple ways to do this, but I use Dropbox for this out of convenience. Here's what I did:

Go to File->Make a Character File (.AVB), then change the file destination to Dropbox.

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Now go to the Dropbox share link for that file, right-click the download button, and select "Copy link address."

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Go back to the character editor, go to File->Properties, paste it into the field for "Characters' URL and delete everything after the .AVB. I'm fairly certain I forgot that last step when I tried to help Probo with this part. Sorry. Scratch that, I just tested leaving the URL intact and apparently it worked, but not for Probo. Will update later.

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Click "OK" and create the character file again, making sure it'll overwrite the first one. Now it's replaced with the version with the link, allowing everyone to download the exact same file you have so when they use it, others can still download it.

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It's now ready to use! Just find it in the character list and give it a go. I tested this entire process on another computer just in case, so if there are any strange unknown problems on another end or there's some better way to do one of these steps under normal circumstances, just let me know.

Now someone please make Robotnik.

tabull's Blog - Hacking Cory in the House DS Part 1: Dialogs

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Back in the summer of 2008, when Cory in the House first made it's way to this site, it was then discovered there was a DS game of the show. The game was pretty dull in terms of gameplay and you start out with the amazing plot of finding bobble heads followed by the memorable task of selling them at a mall. At some point in the Cory in the House thread, someone (I believe either YamiMario or McMangos) delved into the ROM and found that the dialog files were stored as plaintext and could be overwritten to whatever they wanted. Intrigued at this, I got a hex editor and DS ROM unpacker and was able to find the dialog files and made my own dumb edit.


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Planet Freedom. Planet Freedom. They conquered Planet Freedom



The dialog being split into two characters was because I found out I couldn't change the length of the original dialog, they had to be the same or the game would behave weirdly. After all that, more people started making edits to the game and someone came up with the idea that we redo the entire game with our own dialog. I decided to take point on that and created a thread for ROM hacking the game. The thread can be viewed here: http://youchew.net/forum/index.php?/topic/18857-the-cory-in-the-house-hacking-project-day-1-dialog-rom-dl/

A now banned user named Domorato came up with the initial dialog for the beginning of the game, which became this (warning: 2008 humor):

Spoiler


"HELLO I'M DOMORATO" become somewhat of a fad here and was an old banner for the site during the phpBB days. However, not a lot of people were coming up with new dialog so one night I just did a large majority of it and changed all of the day 1 dialog complete with immature humor and everything. While I was doing that, I also found where the the walking and sneaking speed was as well as the gravity for your throwing weapon called nuclear nakishkas. The sneaking speed was painfully slow so I upped that to be faster than the walking speed and made the gravity on the nakishkas negative so they arced up instead of down. I thought that was really funny, so I kept it in the ROM hack. Unfortunately I don't have that hack anymore and I uploaded it to MegaUpload, so unless someone saved it, it's pretty much gone forever.

Fast forward four years where I was no longer a freshman in college with just 2 semesters of C++ and remembering about the old project, I felt like it would be a fun project to write an application that would do all the hacking of the game without needing to use the old way of a Hex editor. Despite the project only lasting a month, I was able to get more done than any of us were able to four years prior. Not only was I able to get rid of the dialog length restriction, I could change the entire conversation so different people said different things in a different order, complete with adding a laugh track whenever I felt like it (by the way, there's a laugh track in this game). The biggest thing I did was reverse engineer the dialog head sprite files and I have to say that was probably the proudest moment I had of the entire project because not only was I able to do it, I did it in less than two days. This was something we spent the entire summer in 2008 trying to figure out and we always came up short. However, all that will be described in the detail in another blog entry.

So, with all that history out of the way, the first thing I did when restarting this project was getting the dialog out of the dialog file since that's what I was most familiar with back when we first did this. The dialog file starts with a long header that looks like gibberish to anyone first looking at it, followed by every line of dialog, which looked like this:


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Here I highlighted the first line of dialog in red. Notice that each character is separated by a dot, looking at the hex values, they are 00, meaning the number 0. This is telling me that the game is storing text in 16 bits, rather than 8 bits as one would normally expect text to be stored as ASCII. Since we don't really care about using foreign characters (I don't even know if the game even supports them), the 00 can be effectively ignored when reading the file. Each line of dialog is prepended with 4 bytes of data saying 00 01 00 00, which I later found out was the number of languages the dialog was in (It would say 00 02 00 00 if there were 2 languages, which funnily enough all say "NEEDS TRANSLATION" for ones that do use multiple languages). After I threw something together something quick I was able to get all the dialogs into an array.


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Note that there are 285 lines of dialog in day 1, this will be useful later.



Now that I was able to get all of the dialog read and stored in the program, the next part to tackle was the giant header that I had no idea what was going on when I first did this in 2008. This is what beginning of the dialog file looks like, with some highlighting done to break apart into chunks.


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The first part highlighted in red, I don't know what it's used for but all the dialog files started with it, so I just stored those four bytes as is. The next part in orange is a 16 bit number. 1D01 converted from hexadecimal to decimal is 7,425. That doesn't really help much, however, the file stores integers in little endian byte order, meaning 1D 01 is actually 011D in hexadecimal. 011D is 285 in decimal, which if you see was the same number of lines of dialog in the file. So, these 2 bytes tell you the count to be expected. So, the easy part is done, now I had to figure out what the rest of those chunks mean. After digging around and knowing that integers are little endian, I noticed the numbers are increasing in size (63, 81, DA, 12A, 17A, 196, etc). So, the next part was to find out what they are in decimal (99, 129, 218, 298, 378, 406, and so on). I decided to take a look at the length of each line of dialog and found this.


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Interesting that 97 and 99 are close, but remember that each line of dialog has 4 bytes of data before it and that each character is 2 bytes, meaning there's 2 extra words (word = 2 bytes) in the length of the line of dialog. Now consider the second line has 28 characters + 4 bytes = 30 words. 99 + 30 = 129, which is the next number. Finally take the third line which has 89 words: 129 + 89 = 218, another number in the list. These chunks of numbers are telling us the offset in 16-byte chunks from the start of the lines of dialog to the next line. That is, the first line has an offset of 0 (the beginning), and the second line is 99 words or 198 bytes from the start. It's an index of where to find each line of dialog.

So, with knowing where the number of lines is stored and how to find each line of dialog, I just had to change that along with the dialog, and I could change the length of each line to be what I wanted. I could even add or remove lines if I chose to. After coding what I found into a dialog file reader/writer, I did what anyone else would do


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And that's all there was to the dialog file, pretty easy compared to the other two things I did, which I will go into next time.

Also, here's the 2012 thread: http://youchew.net/forum/index.php?/topic/105162-cory-in-the-house-ds-rom-hack/

HerrVarden's Alternate-Universe Lair - 5 Commonly Used Tropes That I Have A Hard Time Understanding

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Tropes are something. They're elements in a multitude of different medias that for one reason or another, have been able to spread out for long periods of times. They're factors that help to create the structure of a story and allow you to relate better to the material or give it a sense of logic. es, tropes are a vital part of this world, and it would be incredibly hard not to find something that falls under one of these ideas. But have you ever stopped to think about why the trope exists? Why is the anvil the most commonly dropped object on cartoons' heads? Why are ancient Egyptians usually the same color of skin when there are debates about what race they really are? Sure, a few searches may answer some of the questions, but you can still feel like it won't click with you the right way. You'll still be sitting there, watching the same sort of thing happen without comprehension. These tropes basically make me feel that way. Now, I want to make it clear that just because I don't understand these tropes, it doesn't mean that I'm necessarily against them. They just don't seem to click, that's all. Without further ado, let's get it started.

5. The nosebleed of arousal

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There isn't many other places outside of Japanese entertainment where you see it, but it's still something that I feel should be said. The scenario goes that an incredibly attractive woman is near a dude and immediately the poor guy's leaking red from his nostrils. It doesn't matter if she was leading the guy on for some dirty business or if she merely crossed his path without her noticing, the blood immediately drips out. My first guess was that it might be a cultural aspect, much like how the ancient Egyptians believed that the heart was the brain. Perhaps the nose was a sexual organ and in order to show excitement, a bit of blood had to come out. But if that's the case, then why isn't there more women that have a nosebleed when a guy with a rockin' bod comes by? I rarely find the inverse occurring, and it's not like anime ladies are being deprived of sexy men. The only other option I could think of was that it was a means to sneak past censors and now has become a softer way to imply it. You know, like if you wanted to sneak a dirty joke, you make a kid nosebleed when he sees his hot teacher. That in mind, there's probably a lot more creative and clever ways that the animators can imply sexual undertones, and most of the nosebleeds I've seen usually take place in material that is not meant to be so family friendly. For all I know, it could just be a running gag with unknown origins that continues to be used just for the sake of it.

4. The owl is the wisest animal

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I'm just gonna shoot this down right now, I know that the probable origins of this occurring stem from religion or mythology, but I still think it doesn't work. Okay, it does work, but that's more of a matter of the design taking a good deal of liberties to make the owl look wise, not the owl itself having much of a wise look to them. Owls can be a variety of different characters as far as I know. They can be quirky little buggers on account of their rotating heads and adorable bug-eyes. They can be pretentious bastards with their smug visage and bizarre walk. And they can be menacing creatures when they look upon you with a disgusted glare and let out their spine-tingling call. At best, the owl can look old, but it's never wise. I don't think to myself, "You know, that owl has probably seen some crazy shit". If anything, I usually think, "Man, that owl is doing some crazy shit." Personally, the turtle is a wiser animal to me. They're slow, sure, but they seem to be very aware of their surroundings, considering they can live up to 100 years. Considering that wisdom isn't necessarily relative to age, another pick would be the wolf. They might be more wild, but they carry themselves with a good amount of pride and balance their attributes accordingly. Maybe I'm not the best source for which animals embody which attributes. I mean I think moths are adorable and butterflies are harbingers of doom.

3. Aliens love high-culture

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As far as we know, it is possible that there is other life out there. The chances of us meeting that life or understanding that life may be incredibly small right now, especially in our lifetime, but it is possible that those aliens might act similarly to us. It's also possible that these aliens might be smarter than us since we might believe that they could come to us with their UFOs or whatnot. Thanks to Star Trek, we also might believe that they will have more of an affinity towards literature like Shakespeare or Moliere. Far be it from me to trash talk this trope because I find the verbose extraterrestrial to be a very awesome trope. The thing is that what makes us so sure that the alien will look upon the work that we consider to be the cream of the crop and consider it valuable to us? It's very much possible that aliens might look upon the more common material to better understand humans than those a specific elite choose. I could imagine that later on they might decide to go with some high class work, but I don't think all of them would do it, especially from the get-go. Besides intelligence doesn't necessarily have to equate to having a good understanding of high culture. It could very much well be just culture itself. Not only that, but it's also possible that they're more the "point-and-shoot" kind of aliens. No harm in these sorts of speculations, as far as we know, we're all right and wrong about alien life.

2. The French are cowardly

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Something tells me that at some point in time, the French were the laughingstock of the world, kind of like how the US is. Most of it consisted of them being snobby egotistical jerks or how much they loved Jerry Lewis. One of the widely used jabs that came along at the time must have been that those funky-smelling, beret-wearing baguette-eaters will run at the mere sight of trouble. Now, I'm not the king of France because I still have my head attached to my body, but I think that they can actually be pretty courageous. I'm going to assume that this stereotype had come around the second World War where Paris fell down faster than you could say Jean Luc-Godard. Considering that France at the time was a huge military power, they were probably expecting a little more of a fight. One has to remember that Germany was dominating with their blitzkriegs, catching a great deal of nations by surprise. And might I remind you that France was and still is one of the biggest names in war. They've fought in 168 wars, 109 of which they've won. Couple that with the fact that a lot of military words are derived from the French along with how incredibly ballsy some of the French are when it comes to doing things for the sake of art (Man On Wire proves my point significantly because anyone who has the balls to walk on a wire between the Twin Towers wins points for their nation) or when they're really upset. Hell, even when Vichy came along, the French weren't simply sitting on their asses heiling Hitler. Some of them went to fight with the resistance, which if you can tell, is a word derived from the French. That's gotta be something to at the very least recognize. I wouldn't be surprised if the main reason that American-French relations are tricky stem from the belittling of their successes. Or maybe it could be that whole Bush thing.

1. Black people love watermelons

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Look, I'm very much aware that this is an obvious pick, and I know I'm not the only one to point this out, but as far as stereotypes go, this is the most baffling for me. The other stereotypes, as offensive as they are, make some sense (though I think fried chicken is more universally loved rather than being a specific race's choice of cuisine). This on the other hand seems like a non-sequitur meant to offend someone. Granted, the French stereotype is probably equally as insulting, but at least you can say that the army doesn't reflect how the people themselves would act. With this, you're just throwing a random object, and trying to attribute it to a group of people with a negative connotation. Nothing really indicates to me that black people are incredibly fond of the fruit, and when I see it, it's usually done ironically to make fun of such a ludicrous stereotype. But much like I don't know much about the French, I can't be so certain that I know the black man's preference. Still, it will not make sense to me, nor will it ever make sense to me, no matter how hard you try. It might make me laugh, sure, but I'll only laugh because it's so random, not because I find that sort of racist humor particularly funny.

tabull's Blog - Hacking Cory in the House DS Part 2: Conversations

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In my last entry I talked about the dialog files and how they are stored in the Cory in the House DS game. In this entry, I'll be talking about conversation files as I describe them. In the dialog folder there are two files pertaining to a day, a bst file and a tdf file. The bst file contains all the dialogs while the tdf file tells the game what to do when you talk to someone. They contain things such as who says what or what kind of laugh track to use (did I mention there are laughtracks yet?). There are other things too, such as setting an event, closing the dialog, or even altering the amount of money you have. Trying to reverse engineer the conversation files took a lot of time as there's no clear indication what each byte does when first looking at all. Nearly all of the file contains a bunch of numbers and to be honest, I had to look through my program I made to remember how this file is even structured.

To delve straight into the file, here's what it looks like with some highlighting to show what groups of bytes are related to each other.

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Makes sense, right?


So, let's take each part one bit (no pun intended) at a time.

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This part is the easiest, as it's the only part that has characters, which is the location of the dialog file. The 12 in red is the length in hexadecimal of the filename. The 3 bytes in yellow are just zeros, I'm not sure what it's for, but as all files had them, I just let it go. The next 18 bytes is the filename of the dialog file, so the game knows what dialog to spew out when this file asks for the 12th or whatever line of dialog.

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This part of the file is a bit more confusing, but there is somewhat of a pattern in these. Notice that as with the beginning of the dialog file, these are increasing values (0000, 0200, 0258, 0279, 0317, etc). And similar to the dialog file, this is the index of the file. I presume the game has it programmed so when you talk to such and such, it'll start conversation 6. Conversation six has an offset of 033D, so read the file starting at that offset until the end of the conversation is reached. Also worth noting as that all files have 256 maximum possible conversations, which is why some of these values are 00 00 and why the first offset is 0200 (512 in hexadecimal, or 256 groups of 2 bytes).

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Now the fun part, this is where all the conversations are stored. Every conversation starts with the value 86 followed by 00 or 01. What the 00 or 01 does, I have no clue, but there's something special to take care of when 01 appears, which I'll get to later. I have this part highlighted in red. The next one in blue is the number of commands we'll call them. So in this case the first one is 0A, or 10, commands. We can then read 10 commands and be sure that the next value after is either the next conversation or end of the file. So, then next group of bytes in orange is the offset of the next command. We can use that with the current offset to determine the length of the command. For example, we know that the offset starts at 0200 plus the 5 bytes of the red, blue, and orange section. That means the length of the command is 020D - 0205 = 8. So, we have 00 07 00 00 00 00 00 21 as the command. What does that mean? It took a bit of trial and error, but this is the dialog command. 00 07 means it's a dialog, the next 00 means Cory is speaking (or so I assume, it was always 00 when Cory is talking, but changing it to something else never did anything that I could see), the next 00 00 means to use the 0th dialog from the dialog file, an the 00 21 means to use the 21st character sprite (the happy Cory sprite ;) )


This pattern continues until we reach the 10th command, and we start back at the 86 value and we repeat again until the end of the file. The first conversation looks something like this split apart.

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The xx xx is the offset value I mentioned earlier, but it's not necessary to store these values as they are calculated.


I mentioned that the value after 86 could be 00 or 01, well this is what it looks like if it's a 01

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There are three extra bytes after the 01 and before the number of conversations value. I have no idea what these do, but keeping storing them as is didn't cause any problem so that's what I did.

Now we know how to read the file, the next part is to know what all these commands are, what does it mean when the command starts with 00 86? or 00 27? The only way to find out is to see what happens. Since dialog was the easy one to figure out as they appear most often, finding something between two lines of dialog can help determine what happens. Take 00 86 02 in the above image for example. The dialog before that was Cory saying "And they're sending me a boatload of them so I can sell them to tourists. Hello money!" to which the audience has a light chuckle. There we go, 00 86 tells us to play the laugh track. There's also a 00 86 01 in there, which is a louder laugh after Victor says "That's what I'm afraid of." So the value after 00 86 is telling the game which laughtrack to play. There's also a 00 86 00 laugh which is the equivalent of a Big Bang Theory Windows 7 joke.

I kept on doing this for other commands and was able to guess a good number of them, which are:
00 00 xx - Set Event
    xx = 9-bit integer representing the event

00 07 aa bb cc cc 00 dd - Dialog
    aa = 00 Cory is talking
         01 Someone else is talking
    bb = 00 Normal dialog box
         01 Thought dialog box
         02 Phone dialog box
    cc cc = 16-bit integer representing the line of dialog from the dialog file
    dd = 8-bit integer representing the character speaking  

00 09 xx - Close Dialog

00 27 xx xx 00 00 - Add/Subtract Money 
    xx xx = 16-bit signed integer

    
00 86 xx - Sound effect
    xx = 00 - Uproarious Laughter And Applause
         01 - Loud Laughter
         02 - Chuckle
         07 - Phone Ring
         08 - Phong hang up
Once I got all these figured out along with the dialog file, I could code up an application to change these things and display it in a fashion that's more readable to a human, which ended up looking like this:

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Written by: Larry David


So, I guess the next question is how was I even able to figure all this stuff out? A lot of this was trial and error, but a good portion of it was trying to find patterns. 86 00 appeared a lot, same with 02 (which then became a lot of 03's, then 04's). Seeing those increase meant looking at the value next to them, which also increased, so I knew these had to be related to something with an index, counter, or something similar. 00 07 appeared a lot, too. But once I found the patterns, the hard part was finding out how they all relate to each other, and that really was just a bunch of trial and error with editing the file, recompiling the ROM, and playing the first scene.

After I got a decent understanding I wrote a file reader/writer and created this masterpiece


And this to find see all the dialog sprites and laugh tracks


There's still a bit I don't know about this file, but getting a good enough understanding to write an editor has to be some kind of accomplishment.

The next and final entry will be about the dialog head sprite files. I leave you with an early version of the editor in action set to very inappropriate music.

SkyBlueFox's Blog - Thoughts on the Elder Scrolls Online, 3/16/14

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This past weekend I played the final beta test of The Elder Scrolls Online, after spending a large amount of time on the fence about how I felt about the game. After watching a few videos and looking things up about it, I decided to jump in at the last possible opportunity and give it a proper look for myself, and I was surprised by how well some aspects of the game worked, while mortified at how badly some aspects of the game didn't. I won't hide it: I liked the game and I'm much closer to considering playing it at launch than I was earlier, but that doesn't mean I don't know good design decisions from bad ones, and I wanted to write up the things I liked and disliked about the game.

What I Liked:
  • The Wayshrines
Fast travel isn't anything new to TES, since it was in place all the way back in Arena, but Online's variant of it is helpful without making players overly reliant on them. I think of it as a nice balance between the fast travel that Morrowind has (only from specific spots) and the fast travel the rest of the series has (anywhere, anytime).

You can find Wayshrines scattered around the provinces (sans Cyrodiil, of course), mostly placed in general areas that make up the regions of a province. For example, there's a Wayshrine in Daggerfall, a Wayshrine in Aldcroft, and some Wayshrines in the wilderness in between, like near Glenumbra Moors and such. Players can use these to fast travel to any other wayshrines they've discovered. It's also possible to fast travel to any wayshrine from anywhere... but doing so will cost you gold.

It's a nice way to nudge players towards actual travel and exploration so they don't just fast travel all the time, without taking fast travel away entirely or making it inconvenient to get to far-off places. There's plenty to see and do in Tamriel, and this means that you're much more likely to see it. It's also a nice way to force newbies to explore early, too, as they probably won't have enough cash to blow on frivolous fast travel.
  • The PvP
For being such a marketed aspect of the game, the Civil War in Cyrodiil is surprisingly full-featured, with a large number of forts, outposts, and even quests exclusive to the province that don't involve the civil war in the slightest. The PvP as a whole, though, manages to set the right atmosphere while also being quite fun to play in its own way.

Cyrodiil in general feels very lifeless. This makes sense, given that the whole province is supposed to be basically ransacked and devoid of lots of people aside from soldiers (ie: players), but it helps make the place feel beautiful, yet bleak. It looks familiar, and so it should, to anyone who's played Oblivion before, but many of the landmarks are destroyed or taken over; Chorrol, an idyllic city in the future, is utterly destroyed right now thanks to huge rifts in the earth filled with lava, while Bruma has ironically been taken over by daedra, with Cloud Ruler Temple featuring an Anchor of Coldharbour right above it.

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As for the gameplay, it's well-done, albeit a bit problematic in certain aspects. Perhaps my inexperience with MMOs is coming into play here, but seeing an enormous group of people all rushing in or out, towards or away from forts and places makes things feel grand in scale, and whenever skirmishes or raids break out between factions, there's an appropriate amount of chaos going on in the areas to make battlefields feel warlike. You might fight, and even kill, an enemy player, only to get caught completely off-guard by someone hitting and killing you with a magic spell completely out of left field. I don't consider this to be unfair, and I think Zenimax didn't either, given that the typical durability penalties death brings don't occur in PvP. This is simply how a war like ESO's would work. When I got killed at some points and watched a dozen or so people trample over my corpse during the deathcam, I couldn't help but laugh, simply because it's just so cool.

Unfortunately, it is marred somewhat by a combination of lag and graphical glitches. During an attack on a fort held by the Ebonheart Pact, I was trying to make my way inside to let some arrows fly before I inevitably got my ass handed to me, but the stairs – and the entire wall on the side facing out to the wilderness – was missing and invisible, meaning I had to bungle my way around until I finally found the slope shape that was the stairs. As for the lag, it's what you'd expect. It makes the combat more frustrating than it should be, which is especially unfortunate given how the combat being real-time (so to speak) is important to the gameplay as a whole.

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  • The Skills
This is a big one for me, as an increasing lack of choice in developing my character has been a pox on the Elder Scrolls series for a long time. Morrowind had just the right amount of skills for me, and although it didn't have a lot of non-combat skills (like crafting and such) like Skyrim does, it had enough ways to make for a variety of builds. Thankfully, Zenimax seems to be smarter than Bethesda (or at least, Skyrim's development team) in this regard, as Online's pool of skills is the best I've seen out of the series in a long while, comparable to Morrowind and Daggerfall without question.

When you start the character creation, you can choose one of four classes, but these are really just extremely basic templates. Each class has three exclusive skill trees, but you don't have to put points into them, as things like one-handed weapons and shields, dual wielding, archery, and such are all general skills. Where one Dragonknight might focus on increasing their Dragonknight magic, swordsmanship and heavy armor, another might use medium armor, swords and bows.

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For weapons, there's one-handed and shield, dual wielding, two-handed weapons, archery, and the use of restoration and destruction staves. For armor, there's light armor, consisting of things like robes and hoods for mages, medium armor, consisting of leather or rawhide armor for scouts, rangers or thieves, and heavy armor, the standard choice of the tank. Each race also has its own small skill tree tailored towards its specialties (Khajiit are suited to stealth and medium armor, etc), and even the Fighters and Mages Guilds both have a small number of skills only accessible to members of their ranks. Then you have the crafting skills (blacksmithing, clothing, woodworking, enchanting, and alchemy), and skills to aid in the Civil War, there's tons of potential to build characters, be they generalist or specialist. A siege soldier who can help attack or defend forts, a craftsman who knows how to create and refine items, a hunter, a thief, a berserker.

I can't even begin to really describe how happy I was to discover how much there is to play around with in Online. While there are many other classic skills missing, such as Speech, Sneaking and Lockpicking, I don't mind this. Lockpicking is still around as a small minigame and it requires the player's skill, not the characters, Speech is incorporated into some other trees (a Fighters Guild skill is intimidating some NPCs), and Sneaking is incorporated into a variety of other skill trees. As it stands, Online has the best offering of skills and abilities in years.

What I Disliked:
  • The Drop Rate
When crafting items in the game, you need materials, of course. For clothing you'll need Jute, gathered from flower patches, or Rawhide, gathered from animals like deer and wolves (and werewolves!). For metal items you'll need Iron Ore, for wooden items like shields and bows you'll need Maple wood. What I don't like is how annoyingly difficult it is to find these items in large quantities, especially in some areas.

Each faction of the game has a “starter island” that newbie players will probably end up going to, and the quests and enemies on them are a low enough level to ease characters into the game. Supplies tend to be plentiful on these islands, but unfortunately that's not really the case for some materials. Rawhide is easily collected from areas that are populated with lots of wolves, but wood and ore is more scarce, which isn't a good idea.

Take Stros M'kai, for example. Just outside of Port Hunding, the main town on the island, is a spot with five wolves all close by, and a short walk away can find you three more wolves to kill. While you aren't 100% guaranteed a Rawhide drop, with eight enemies and a fairly quick respawn time, going hunting is a fairly efficient gathering process, and actually rather fun instead of feeling grindy.

However, it's a bit more difficult to find Iron Ore spots to mine at, and even harder to find places to chop up some Maple wood for your shields and bows; neither material type has a fast respawn time, either, which exacerbates the issue. This can lead to a lot of running around like a headless chicken, looking for ore and wood spots or just stubbornly waiting for ones to respawn, which does feel grindy and not very fun. I understand that Zenimax doesn't want people camping these areas, but the amount of time wasted looking for chopping blocks and rocks to smash open gets annoying fast.
  • The Small Dungeons
The dungeons in Online are one of the biggest disappointments for me, and I imagine anyone else in my position would probably feel similarly. This is probably more of a personal issue than the other things I've discussed here, since obviously the game's world had to be squashed some to fit properly, but the dungeons are housed in separate sections compared to the mostly-seamless outside areas, so there's little reason that going spelunking should be so lacking.

The main areas I found this to be noticeable were in a Dwemer ruin on Stros M'Kai, and in an Ayleid ruin on Betnikh. Both were particularly small and exceedingly linear to boot, with the Ayleid ruin consisting of a hallway or two with one small, empty room connecting them before leading into the boss area. It's hard to feel like a treasure hunter or an adventurer if all the dangerous ruins or caverns are so simple.

Ironically, the tutorial area, consisting of large rooms with an entrance, exit, and some confusing, similar-looking passages filled with item bags and spike traps, was one of the best dungeons I played through during the whole weekend. It wasn't so big that it was hard to get around, but it wasn't so small that it felt like filler. A different dungeon on Stros M'kai, a prison cavern, was also fairly good; still somewhat linear, but at least containing some sprawling rooms and a little exploration. If more dungeons in the game could be like this, I think that the atmosphere of exploration would be improved as a result. I don't expect dungeons to be as big as the ones in Oblivion or Skyrim, but they do need to be bigger than most of the ones I played are right now.
  • The Difficulty Curve
The difficulty curve that the game seems to have is atrocious, mainly because it seems to run somewhat in opposition compared to the rest of the series or even the design concepts of Online as a whole. Granted, it's easy to just sprint past enemies before they can go from unaware to cautious to aggressive, but it doesn't always work and once you've aggro'd an enemy, you'll have a tough time getting them to bugger off. There's clearly an attempt here to halt progress by making enemies unreasonably difficult to combat, and it probably sounded good on paper, but it just doesn't work here.

The main reason I bring this up is because of the way this curve is implemented, at least when it comes to the Daggerfall Covenant. In Daggerfall, some of the earliest quests you can start are right in the city, and pit players against enemies that are no higher than levels 3 or 4, around the same strength the character will be once they leave the tutorial. Outside of the city, however, things are far more dangerous. Red Rook bandits are level 6 or 7, and imps and other creatures can be found on the way to the next town, Aldcroft, that are levels 8 or 9. Heading to Glenumbra Moors and Camlorn after that brings enemies that are level 10 at least and level 12 at most, with the boss in Camlorn being level 14.

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What the curve expects players to do is finish the quests in Daggerfall city, then take a ship to Stros M'kai, where the hardest enemies are level 4 and there are a multitude of simple, get-your-feet-wet quests to bump a character's level up to 4 or 5, possibly 6. After finishing the line of quests there, players can travel to Betnikh, which has some more quests and where enemies are around levels 5 and 6. Once the quests here are finished, a player will probably be around level 7 or 8, making travel back outside of Daggerfall much less precarious.

This feels very unintuitive to me and I'm not sure why Zenimax decided to design the areas with this in mind. The reason players will probably travel around the provinces is to explore, find dungeons or enemies to fight, and complete quests to gain experience, items and levels, but the quests further into the world rise in difficulty, which seems to force players down one of two bottlenecks: either do the easier quests first, or try and form a group with some higher-level players so they can help you out. One could also just stubbornly grind every enemy they can find until they slowly gain enough experience to start taking on the harder monsters. But this ends up feeling grindy, of course, and it will never be as time- and experience-efficient as completing the quests.

This may simply be my inexperience with MMOs speaking (as I've only seriously played Runescape, Mabinogi and TESO), but it's disheartening to see how the difficulty of the game damages the aspects of freedom and exploration that the series is known for. If it were easier to gain levels without having to do quests, this problem might be alleviated somewhat, but I'm not sure how this would be possible without increasing the enemy experience payout, which would result in new problems.

It also makes me wonder about the viability of a crafting specialist character like I mentioned up above. How will crafters get the experience, levels and skill points necessary to increase their crafting skills?

Overall:

...I really, really want to preorder Online. I'm not even going to mince words, I probably will end up preordering Online just because it hooked me right from the start, which is something scant few games do to me nowadays.

I haven't even discussed some of the more general things about the game here, like the graphical fidelity of the game (it looks pretty good, not cutting-edge, but certainly not terrible), the various questlines in each area, so on and so forth. While I don't think it's a WoW-killer by any means, Online's got a lot of potential and I'm surprisingly confident in Zenimax's ability to pull it off. Comparing it to some other online games that were released in recent years, like TORtanic, Online simply looks much more polished, which is ironic considering it partly comes from a company known for releasing buggy games.

Personally, what I think the game does best is serve as an entry point to the series. Placing the game in the 2nd Era chronologically cuts it off from the singleplayer games, and offering three factions and lots of skills and build opportunities means it has far more roleplaying content than Oblivion or Skyrim, meaning Online can be enjoyed perfectly well without any prior experience or knowledge of the main series gameplay- or story-wise.

Given that the beta test this weekend was on a less recent build (this stress test was on the most-PvP-optimized server, which had bugs on it that have been ironed out in more recent builds, I'm expecting the launch to have less issues in that regard (solving some problems in regards to the difficulty curve at least), but it obviously won't change the small size of the dungeons or the item drop rate. However, it'll probably make the good things I mentioned even more appreciable, and I can say that if I was on the fence about how I felt about Online before, I'm certainly more positive about it now.

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So I say... for the Covenant!
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